Self-Indulgence Take Two

Sea World

2011-10-29T18:06:00.003-04:00

This year we've taken a few weekends away. Just us, as a little family. We don't go far, usually just Daytona or Orlando. But with all the craziness in our daily lives, it's been so nice to have weekends like these to breath and relax away from the hustle and bustle.

Today we took Julianna to Sea World for the Halloween event. She didn't dress up, just in her new boots. She was the only girl in purple boots in all of Sea World.

Time for Change

2011-09-22T22:49:00.008-04:00

I knew coming into today's Facebook announcements that they would indeed be huge. Game-changers were expected, and I approached the afternoon with tons of excitement. For a person working in social media, F8 is kinda like a holiday every year. Excitement flourishes and some new exciting features are released. Today, was just a little different, as I feel Facebook has outdone even my own expectations, and I didn't even realize it until tonight.

I won't go into all the details because there are tons of social media blogs you can read about all the changes, like here, and, here and here. I wouldn't necessarily say that I jumped at the chance to activate my new Facebook Timeline. I am more quick to adapt to change than most, but there's still that "oh my goodness, what I KNOW is changing again" feeling that took over for a slight moment at work today. It totally made me think twice about if I was ready to use the Facebook Developer back-door way into experiencing Timeline.

I knew what I was going to see because I saw the video that was played during the F8 live feed, and read at least 10 blogs about the Timeline changes. But I could not expect how profound it was going to be to search through my new Timeline with Julie.

As soon as I made the change she came over to look at my laptop. She knows that mommy always looks at the cool photos of her cousins when I am on Facebook at night. So, we began to peruse my new Timeline together....through the months this year since our move back to Florida, and then 2010 & 2009 in Atlanta & New Smyrna Beach. Until we got to 2008 when she was born. Through each scroll, she was pointing and excited to see all the photos of her life. She kept referring to herself in 3rd-person, as if that little version of her in the photos was someone she barely knew, saying "oooohhhh Julie-baby dressed like Minnie Mouse....Julie-baby wearing her white bow....Julie-baby in her diaper." Her whole life literally flashed in about a 10-minute scroll through my new Facebook profile. It was amazing to see all the images and hone in on some of my updates through these last few years. I saw words I forgot I wrote, and pictures I haven't browsed in quite some time.

I always thought that I'd eventually print this blog into a book to show Julianna her childhood. That is, until I stopped posting on here months ago. Today, Facebook has given every one of their users the ability to bind the history of their life onto one simple webpage. It's definitely the game-changer we were all told was coming and it will emotionally drive social to the next level. What most summed it up for me was when I saw one of my Facebook status updates from June 2008, just days after Julie was born. "Anne DiNapoli is in love with Julianna." And my heart melted all over again.

Beach Times

2011-02-24T22:48:00.010-05:00

When I was a kid, my sister and I would go down to Hollywood Beach, FL every year to stay with our grandparents for Spring Break. Some of my favorite memories are strolling up and down the beach with my grandmother looking for the perfect shells to use for her crafting. She would decorate anything in shells....mirrors, lamps, picture frames. Some of those items are still my most cherished possessions.

This past weekend was absolutely gorgeous in Florida. It was about 80 degrees all weekend. Spring has definitely sprung in Florida this February. It was also a long weekend, as I was off on President's Day for the first time in my adult life. I seriously work for one of the best companies ever. On Saturday, we took Julie to Sea World for the first time. She loved it and although she was exhausted and cranky, we all had a great time. She loved the penguins and even told her teacher at daycare all about them on Tuesday when she returned to school.

Then on Sunday, I convinced Josh to take Julie and I to the beach while we waited for his car to get fixed at the dealer. Since we just moved, we had no idea where to go the beach in Tampa, so we crossed the bridge and headed west. We followed the first sign we saw to Indian Rocks Beach. We parked the car at this amazing little eatery/ice cream shoppe and got Julie the coolest ice cream cone of her little life. The place was super old and if you looked up at the dirty ceiling you'd probably think twice about eating there. I loved it. Florida beach charm at its finest and I felt like I was home in Daytona for the first time since we've moved back.

When we finally made our way down to the beach, I was amazed at all of the beautiful shells. In Volusia County, it's rare to find a lot of shells on the beach, so haven't seen them in years. The shoreline was covered and once Julie was brave enough to put her feet down in the sand---(side note: Julie is afraid of everything these days. Must be something she gets from Josh ;)), she took right away to scanning the patches for the perfect shells to throw in the water. It made me want to laugh and cry, but it was an amazing experience and was something I'll remember forever.

And so I'm back....

2011-01-03T21:04:00.007-05:00

To the blogosphere. Oh how I've missed you. I can't believe it's been two months since I've written a blog, although, knowing my schedule for these last months, I actually can pinpoint the exact reason. Time has been sort of a commodity these days. Since mid-November, I have not worked less than 55 hrs in one week. And with prepping for holidays, unpacking from our move, trying to be a half-decent mother and spouse...there has just been no time for this little ol' blog.

Some people have said they miss me on here. I appreciate that sooo much. I miss reading my favorite blogs too. I'll be commenting once again!

I have a full list of resolutions for 2011. Not like last year, when weight loss was my only agenda....somehow, that is on my list AGAIN, I'm not so surprised really :)

1) My camera has been broken since our move. I do not have any marvelous photos of my beautiful girl to share. It is getting fixed this week, no excuses. I need to document these precious moments on something besides my cell phone and I can't find the throw-away cameras I've purchased for the major holidays, so that I'd have SOMETHING to put in our albums. 2) The albums that are updated through Julianna's ripe age of 13 months. She is now 31 months. Since that day, I have not added a single gosh darn snapshot. 3) I say gosh darn because I am not cursing anymore. Many would probably be surprised to know that I am the curser in the family. And I hate it, especially when I do it front of Julianna. No more, I am breaking the cursing cycle. My daughter will not swear like her mother. 4) Mothering in general has been challenging these days. I regret to say I've been guilty of picking work over Julie and caring for our family. TG Josh has been an amazing man as always, and has picked up much of the heavy lifting. Julie's tiny days are going so fast, and I don't want time to pass by. I'm slowing down in general. 5) That is, once we move. Yes, we are moving again. I am on the hunt for our next home. Our move to Tampa has been wonderful and because of my hard work these past few months I am proud to say I have a permanant position with my company in Atlanta working from home in Tampa. Josh's work is also going very well....so we know were staying here for quite some time. The thought of continuing to rent and knowing that we are not settled into a home that is ours...that we will have to pack and move from one day is making me ill. I am literally depressed, not to sound so dramatic, but I am when it comes to this subject. A few weeks ago we were pre-approved and have been looking for the place we will raise Julie. Where she go to school one day, where we will hang pictures, knowing they will not be unhung and wrapped up again. The pressure to find this house has not been like any of the others I've bought, but I am confident we'll be blessed with the one that's meant to be. 6) And when we move, I'll finally settle. And begin to digs roots in community like I did in Daytona. Meet friends, go back to church and share in my faith with Julie. 7) Jules, who needs to potty train. And because of resolution 4, is not quite there yet. OK I'm not pulling anyone's chain here, she is actually quite far from it. With the exception of daycare, where there seems to be a little magical potty that makes her go. 8) And through all of this I will write, because it's one of the only things I do for myself. And to take care of everything else this year, I need to start with myself. 8) Which is why I finally bit the bullet today and got glasses. They were much needed and I can finally see as I type this.

Happy New Year!

Riverview in November

2010-11-02T21:21:00.006-04:00

We made it! We're Florida residents once again....for exactly 3 weeks and counting. It was a horrible move with lots of headaches, hiccups, and hair pulling, but it's over. Now, we just have a lot more unpacking to do.

Our new house that Josh picked is growing on me, although we are lacking some much needed storage space. If you saw our last closet, you would totally understand. We are also about 5 miles from the rest of the civilized world. Doesn't sound that bad I know, but compared from where we came, it's been an adjustment. It's also created a huge challenge when selecting a daycare. And after a few teeth marks in Julie's forearm, we found a fantastic daycare in Brandon. Riverview doesn't seem to have good options for child care.

My mom was here for a week. It was wonderful to have her and she did what she does best, cleaned and helped take care of Julie. I have been working a lot of hours during the whole moving and settling process, which is probably why we just got sheets on our bed last night for the first time since the move. I need some help.

Julie has asked to go home a few times. This broke my heart, until I realized that it has not been under 75 degree in FL since the day we got here. With Atlanta temps in the 50's most mornings. She should be thanking us profusely. She is also the only 2 year-old I know with her own floor. The whole upstairs is hers, with a loft/playroom, private bath and huge bedroom (I think even bigger than ours)....it's a normal kid's dream. The only problem is she refuses to sleep in her new quarters and she's slept everywhere from the couch, to our bed, even on the floor in the living room since the move. And apparenlty her sentiment is that I am a mean, witch mommy for even suggesting that she sleep in the extravagent space. Since she has always been a crib sleeper, this has also been quite an adjustment.

Lots has changed, but we're happy about the move and I am finally in a place where I can share a little bit about it.

A Florida Mom Back Home

2010-09-23T22:02:00.003-04:00

I thought this post would be more profound, but I just looked at this blog for the first time in weeks and I have noticed it's been 23 days since my last post. What's going on?
Well, we're moving again. Back to Florida!!!

Not home in Daytona, but close enough. We'll soon be Tampa residents.

This change came about about a month and half ago when I was sitting in the LaGuardia airport waiting for my flight back home from BlogHer. Josh called me right before I boarded the plane to drop a huge bomb and let me think about whether or not I'd want to move. I was by myself for the next three hours on that plane and all I wanted to do was cry.

I finally felt like Atlanta was becoming home, but then the excitement hit. You mean, we could go back to Florida!!!!

Basically, Josh's boss wanted him to tranfer to the campus down there. It took quite a few weeks of nail biting until the final plans were set about two weeks ago. And Josh is actually already down there working and house hunting. Jules and I will follow in two weeks.

Crazy huh? Seems like deja vu from this time last year. The absolute best part is that my awesome job is letting me keep my position and work from home.

So the next few weeks will be lots of crazy, and emotions and happiness all rolled into one. Although I will say that it is much easier going through it with a 28 month-old vs. a 15 month-old. Wish us luck the next few weeks and I'll try to send updates!

Home for the Holiday

2010-09-01T23:23:00.004-04:00

This exact time last year, we were packing up our house in New Smyrna Beach to head to Atlanta. Our only celebration for the Labor holiday was when we finally arrived into Alpharetta, late on a Sunday evening. I loved the home Josh picked for us. I was overjoyed at how beautiful it was, and I pranced through the halls and up the stairs with happiness. We actually made the right decision to move, I thought, for the first time in weeks. I loved the excitement of a new life, new jobs and new cities to get to know.

A lot can change in a year. It has been a fantastic year overall. The best part has been watching our beautiful daughter grow into quite the most-awesome 2 year-old.

We're headed on the road again this Labor Day. Taking the same drive that we took last September, with our car stuffed full of stuff that wouldn't fit in the moving truck. Except this time, we're headed south back to Florida, our real home.

I am excited to see my mom, aunt and grandmother. I am excited for rest and relaxation.
And when I think back on the stress, heartache and headaches of moving cross-state, I know it was all worth it. Life has never stopped being exciting this year for our little family, and we've been blessed to soak it all in.

Josh, Happy 1 Year Anniversary as a Georgia resident, honey! We made it! (Now, just don't tell the DMV ;)

Settled In

2010-08-29T13:44:00.006-04:00

Sometimes I just need a day to catch my breath, however, I like to always be on-the-go. Quite the opposite from Josh. He would sit at home and watch TV every weekend if I let him. To me, that's just no fun.

There were so many things I wanted to do today. Visit Six Flags, the Atlanta Botanical Gardens, or have a day trip to the North GA Mountains, but alas we're sitting on the couch watching Slum Dog Millionaire. Julianna is taking a rare weekend nap, I have a lot of my chores done and the bills are paid.(and it's not even the first yet!) I even had time to wash Julie's daycare sneakers and trim the extra plastic off the bread wrapper. I love feeling totally in control.

When I look back at this time last year, and how crazy our lives were with moving cross-state and finding houses and packing. I can really appreciate having the ability to relax and the vast options of our weekend plans. The best part is that I don't have nagging feelings of being behind in everything!

But I know this is just the calm before another storm. It seems like just as we get settled and in control of life, something happens to disturb our peace. I guess life is just like that, especially for full-time working parents.

My dad used to tell me all the time, "in life don't get too high, don't get too low." It's hard to stay in the middle. Right now, everything is surprisingly perfect (OK, well, except my horrendous commute to work.) I adore my job, our house & neighborhood and I am fortunate that my loves are all happy and healthy.

It's lazy days like today, that make me appreciate our life and all the blessings Josh and I have come to find this year. I am excited, yet apprehensive on what lies ahead...

Secret Toddler Language

2010-08-25T22:23:00.009-04:00

Julianna is talking. A lot. Full sentences and all the time. It really and truly amazes me. Since she's talking so well, there's not a lot that Josh and I don't make her ask for. Even if we know what she's talking about, we encourage her to say it. I think I use the words "speak clearly" more than any other two words in the English language these days. I know it probably sounds a little harsh to tell that to a 27 month-old, but I can tell when she gets lazy her pronunciation at times. It's like I'm her mother or something.

It's awfully strange to know exactly what she is saying, especially when it comes out in a slur. It reminds me that I'm her mother.

Before I had my own kid, I could never understand toddler talk. I used to watch my sister identify exactly what my niece wanted when she was Julie's age and I would be mesmerized that such translation existed. I would look over at her and say, "You really got that?" Amazing. Everything that kid said, I would just look at my sister with a look that said "huh?"

I guess when it's your own kid you just adapt to the toddler lingo. Or at least a Mom does. I am constantly translating for Josh. He just misses things. I would argue that it's because I am a tad smarter than he. He would probably say it's not only because Julie is two, but she also has a bit of a Chinese accent from her daycare teacher. He does have an argument. She sometimes sounds very much like her teacher. That's probably a sign that she's at daycare too long. (dang Atlanta traffic!)

Nonetheless, when he, or Aunt Kenzie, or anyone looks over at me, to ask with a face, "What the heck did she just say?" It enthralls me. No one else knows because I'm her only mother. And I think that's a pretty awesome reminder.

These are my favorite phrases that she says these days....

"Mommy I want to Twiller too".... (Twitter)

"Need my bugget shovval".... (I need my bucket and shovel)

"Happy Bi-thhhhday"

"Julie," this, that and everything. She loves talking about herself <---- a trait totally from her Dad

"One more eppp-i-sllluurrrrrrrr"....while holding up her pointer finger- (asking to watch another episode of Blues Clues before Night Night)

I wuvv you. - My absolute favorite :)

Atlanta Traffic Sucks...For Real

2010-08-19T20:56:00.007-04:00

OK folks, you knew this was coming eventually. I need to vent about the traffic in Atlanta.

So, I told you how I got this awesome new job about two months ago. I am working for one of the best interactive ad agencies in the U.S. and I really, truly love what I do. In fact, I think I have one of the coolest jobs ever.

Now of course, not everything can be all peaches and cream. Such is life. There is one major downside to my job....Its location. Well, in reference to where I live anyway.

When we moved here from Florida, almost a year ago, (it will be a year in September, can you believe that?) we didn't know where the heck we would live. Josh was working in Sandy Springs and I was working in Lawrenceville. Not knowing anything at all about Atlanta, we simply looked at the map, pointed to Alpharetta and said, "that place looks good." Except really, it wasn't that easy, ask Josh and our extremely patient realtor.

Anyway, it all turned out well. We picked an affordable, beautiful area, with lots of kids, nice homes, and low-crime. If you Google Alpharetta you'll see it's a much desired place. That is unless you're like me and end up leaving your crummy job in Lawrenceville, for a heavenly job in the thick of the city....right where Dowtown and Midtown meet, near GA Tech.

When I started this job about two months ago, all was well. My boss was understanding (and still is, TG) of my schedule with picking Julianna up from daycare, and the 23 miles into the city took about an hour. The perfect amount of time to get in some phone calls to friends, along with a relaxing array of 90's music and Howard Stern.

That was then. This was today. School is in session for Fulton County and I'm guessing every other county and the lovely students from GA Tech are arriving in rapid force. That same 23 miles took 2 hours this morning and about an hour and 40 minutes this evening.

Did you hear that? Oh My GAAAHHHHH, that's what I was screaming by the end of my trips. 3 hours and 40 minutes in my car today...for 46 highway miles. Excuse my language, but that is un-fucking-believable. And I didn't even get to go to Miami. That's what my Daytona Beach mind associates with a 3+ hour car trip.

You know why? Because people in Florida just don't drive that long for work. We refuse. It must have to do with the beach, why would you drive that far for work when you could just go to the beach and be a bum. That's my logic. In fact, Josh and I became roommates three years ago because my 45 minute trip from Port Orange to Orlando was way too far of a drive everyday for work.

But not here. Nope. HERE in Atlanta, everyone is on the road driving. I think the whole city must leave their house precisely at 7:30am, when I do. It's pure torture to crawl at a 5mph pace, watching the smog grow thicker as I approach the city.

A working mom doesn't have time for this BS. So much of my day is wasted. I could be working, writing, spending with Julie, working-out, doing any of my many house chores and property management stuff. WTF. Someone needs to invent a voice-activated blogging system. Maybe then this blog would get updated in a timely fashion.

Is there a solution for this? Will it calm down, when half of these college kids figure out two weeks into the semester that they don't really need to go to class?

I can't say I wasn't warned. Everyone told me my drive would suck when school started. I just didn't think it would be this bad. And don't get me started about any of the a-holes that run out of gas in their brand new BMW SUV's. Then, sit parked in the middle of the 5 lane highway. We know your car did NOT break down. You were just too dumb to keep your tank full. I think I'm going to start carrying eggs in my car for people like that. Would that be considered road rage?

Photo by jwinfred

It's Monday & Not So Bad

2010-08-16T23:29:00.004-04:00

It's been a while since I've made a list. Some things are on my mind. I've been wishing....

1) That our trip home to FL for Labor Day weekend comes soon. I can't wait to see my family and feel the sand in my toes.

2) That there's any possible chance that my Bloggers Fantasy Football team will win this season. You see, I had a major computer malfunction and I did not pick well. I know, excuses, excuses. I blame Josh. Unfortunately, This Daddy is going to kick my butt.

3) That Julie would be a little baby again for just a day. She is growing so fast. Talking so much. I can't believe she's so big. When I came home from NY I almost fell over when I saw how big she was. I didn't realize it until I was away for a few days.

4) That I will lose some weight with this new Wii game, Just Dance, that we bought this weekend with a coupon I received at BlogHer. Their stage set-up at the expo was awesome and totally intrigued me to buy. Good job marketing, folks!

5) That I could be independently wealthy so I can spend more days with Julie and Josh. I love the weekends, even though I love my new job. I just miss my little girl during the day so much at times.

6) That I could keep my car clean for just a week. No matter how many times I clean it, it inevitably becomes disastrous.

7) That I could successfully start my own business this year. I'm looking for name suggestions.

8) That we will have enough money saved when the time comes to buy Super Bowl tickets in 2011. When the Jets GO ALL THE WAY!

Hope everyone is having a fabulous week so far!

My BlogHer Trip to New York City

2010-08-11T21:56:00.009-04:00

This past February I made the decision to go to NYC for a blogging conference. It was 20 degrees outside, and all I could think about was a summer retreat. I really didn't know what to expect. I thought that even if I absorbed a few new blogging tips, it would be good for my new found career.
My decision turned into a trip that was epic, well for my life anyway. More than two thousand women gathered at the Hilton New York on the corner of 6th and 53th. A great location and a great group of women.
We shared common passions for words, blogs, social media, Twitter and technology. I have never felt more empowered by a set of peers in my life. Not only are many of these women amazing writers, they are some of the most tech savvy people I will ever meet. Smartphones and iPads galore, along with style, intelligence and diaper cream. Although not everyone there was a mom. That's what was also so cool. The rooms and sessions filled with diversity from race, region and lifestyle. I loved it.
And people were nice! Can you believe that? Lots of smiles, hugs, laughter...seemed too good to be true, or perhaps I just wore my rose-colored glasses all weekend. I'm OK with that. Ignorance is bliss.
Some highlights included 1) a private acoustic performance by Gavin DeGraw at the Schick Intuition Kiss and Tell Party, 2) my roommate, @Luxetips, who was simply amazing and fun. 3) meeting some of the writers that I love to follow and who I feel like I know so well from afar.
It was my very first time away from Josh or Julie that didn't involve work. That alone felt uplifting at times. In the middle of the day I went up to my hotel room and laid in bed thinking..."I can do WHATEVER I want right now." That's a perfect feeling.
NYC played it's own character in my trip. I forgot how beautiful the city can be and I enjoyed local treats like vanilla cupcakes from Magnolia Bakery and the city's best asset, my Uncle, who I visited in Queens.
I will never forget this trip. I almost don't want to go to BlogHer 11 because I can't mess with perfection. Although....I am already looking for things to do in San Diego.

Avocados are Fickle Like Two Year-Olds

2010-08-02T23:13:00.011-04:00

I used to hate guacamole. Utter the word avocado and the thought of green mush would turn my stomach upside down. However, that was last year. Actually about 6 months ago. Things change. There is one blessing/Ireallydon'tneedtoeatanythingelsethatsfattening thing that the state of Georgia has definitely provided me...a taste for avocados.
Not that we get better ones here in Atlanta. I just think this move came with a change in taste buds perhaps. Because even though I didn't eat avocados in FL...I'm sure the ones there ARE better. I'm just sayin'.
Which brings me to my point. As an avid avocado eater of the past 6 months, I have learned one thing. All guacamole tastes different because avocados are fickle. Don't make the mistake I made Saturday evening while I was out with Kenzie and her mom Rita. I picked Uncle Julio's near the Perimeter Mall to celebrate my post-birthday soiree, declaring..."because they have the best guac in town!"
I became quite the liar.
Not that it wasn't good, because as with the s-e-x word, even a bad one is good in its own way. It just wasn't the OMG you've died and gone to Mexican Restaurant Guacamole Heaven that I proclaimed it was.
Has anyone else experience this before? I mean come on, really, if you think about it. How could guacamole taste different anyway? It's the same ingredients in EVERY recipe...sans a few diced tomatoes or squirts of lime here and there. It's the avocados. They're fickle!
It was a great dinner (thanks Rita!) and we did eat every last bit of guacamole that came in that appetizer bowl. But no one proclaimed, "wow Anne...you were so right."
Not even Julianna, who smothered her lips in green mush the last time Josh and I dined Mexican only about a month ago. She wouldn't touch it this time. Not that it was bad...because it really was good. She just decided that on Saturday, she didn't like avocados, just like her daddy doesn't every day that ends in "Y"
And why would she, when at the drop of dime, she can change. Become unpredictable. She can go from a sweet mommy's girl, to a crinkled-eyed, mommy-hater, just because I give her the un-orange sippy cup. All with this horrible look that says "Mom, did you know that you're too dumb to walk the face of this Earth? I know, why else would you give me this pink sippy."
Did I mention my daughter is only two?
Lucky for me it's mysteries like avocados and Julie that keep life interesting.

********

I also wanted to say that I am going to BlogHer this week in NYC! Unfortunately, I will not have a guest blogger like so many people I know who are going. I may blog or I may not while I'm there. Just pretend it's like any other typical month around here!
I am so excited about my trip for three reasons. 1) It's BlogHer 2) It's NYC 3) And most importantly....I am going to see my Dad's brother for the first time in almost three years. Well, since my dad's funeral to be exact. And unlike that Julio...this uncle never disappoints.

Oh Happy Days.

I Heart Chattanooga

2010-07-29T22:11:00.009-04:00

As I mentioned in my last post Josh surprised me with a trip to Chattanooga for my birthday last weekend. We had such an amazing time, even though it was a 100 degrees outside both days we were there.
I love that Atlanta is within driving distance to so many great cities in the South. I think we'll have to take more weekend trips.
Chattanooga is a little city, surrounded by mountains, on the bed of the Tennessee River. Gorgeous and quaint. I loved it.
On another note, I've been battling a horrible cold this week. There is nothing worse than being sick in the summer. It's almost as bad as being forced to watch the first episode of the new season of Jersey Shore...sorry honey. I know I make you suffer.

Josh and Julie in the Ruby Falls cave. It was so cool, but I didn't like how closed in it felt.

Staying hydrated after our cave hike.

On Saturday afternoon taking a nap at the LookOut's game. It was soo hot.

The Chattanooga LookOut's field. Reminded me of the Daytona Cubs games back home.

We took a tour on a duck..some kind of truck/boat vehicle from WWII. I think this was my favorite part of the trip....expect for the heat. I didn't know my legs could sweat until I got off that thing.

At the Children's Museum in Dowtown Chattanooga on Sunday.

Packing our hotel room.

On the rookftop of the children's museum. I can't wait for the day that she'll actually pose for a picture with me again.

The sunset on Saturday. Beautiful.

Jules loved playing in the water at the museum.

This is a good Daddy.

I'm 28

2010-07-25T23:14:00.005-04:00

Ten years ago I loved turning 18. I remember the day almost like it was yesterday. It started with a trip to the Publix on Kirkman Road in Orlando to buy my first lotto ticket. It ended with a dinner with my dad and a sleepover with my three best girlfriends, Kelly, Jamie and Melissa. I was living in a two bedroom apartment with my dad. I drove a crummy, white Chevy Cavalier. I worked at Nine West selling shoes in the Florida Mall and was just about to start school at a local community college. Life was pretty good. Fast forward ten years later, and it continues to be great.
As happy I was then, I had no idea that ten years later a daughter and a another man besides my dad would make my life complete. To celebrate my 28th birthday Josh surprised me with a weekend getaway to Chattanooga, TN. It was beautiful and hot as hell, just like anywhere else in the east this weekend. I spent time with my little family, relaxing and enjoying the mountain views. We walked through caves and took in a minor league baseball game. I didn't think about anything....just enjoyed life.
So what is life ten years after I officially became an adult?
Somedays I really don't know. I work, raise my daughter and have most everything I want. If success is measured by material items, I could consider myself a lucky woman. The three of us have more space and more house than my dad or I could have ever hoped for ten years ago. I drive a comfy, luxury SUV that is paid for completely and I don't have to kill my feet by standing all day to pay for my car insurance.
The 18 year old me is delighted. The 28 year old me expects nothing less. After all, I've worked really hard to get here.
I'm fortunate that I know that life is more than stuff. My parents always taught me that. If you ask me success is love and I'm fortunate that at 28 to have plenty of that too.
And I usually don't share what I'll be wishing for when I blow out my candles, but I'll let you in on a secret. I wish that the next ten years is as amazing as the last ten. I wish to continue to work hard and thank God for all my blessings and love. I wish to always know that everything happens for a reason, and to use my dad's death as a reminder to trust in the Lord. Finally, I wish that I'll continue to have Josh, Julie and all my family and great friends to share life with. Because that's what makes life happy.

We Have Videos! Well, sort of....

2010-07-22T21:17:00.004-04:00

It's taken 26 months, but we finally have a video of Julianna! And, no, it was not from the thousand dollar HD video camera that we bought when I was pregnant. You know, the one that is horrible, problematic and takes a tech genius to upload. That sucky one, that has caused arguments between Josh and I on Christmas, is still sitting at the bottom of our closet collecting dust. (At least it's not lost anymore, thanks honey) Yep, it was NOT that one. Nope. This one. The one that works. Was free. Well, free by default. It came on my new cell phone.

A cell phone successfully captured our daughter eating ice cream and transferred the images, amazingly on a computer. Imagine that. Who needs a video camera these days? Now, if I only I could figure out how to record the proper way, so you don't have to strain your neck to see this precious face. Baby steps.
Enjoy!

"P" is for Pillow...That's Good Enough for Me

2010-07-19T22:03:00.008-04:00

Besides our keen obsession with sports I often wonder why Josh and I are meant to be. I found out the answer yesterday at exactly 8:30pm.

Julie and I spent our Sunday afternoon shopping with my friend Ashley. We drove into Midtown, had lunch at this awesome Mexican place on Highland Ave, not to be confused with North Highland, which I learned all about during my second Atlanta tour with Ashley.

My shopping list consisted of one goal. New sheets and pillows for our bed.

I instantly and successfully found the perfect light blue, egyptian cotton sheets to match our comforter. Then moved ahead to the pillow aisle of the Home Goods in Buckhead. That's when I got all confused. Which pillows should I buy? Which one is just like mine at home? Which ones will Josh, like? You see, he's kinda pillow obsessed.

I have never seen anyone in my life use as many pillows as Josh. He always needs about 5. Two under his head, then three propped strategically around his body. One less, and he barely can shut an eye. When we first started dating this would sort of bother me. He has pillows surrounding him, and I couldn't cuddle in the middle of the night. I always just use one pillow...to me, that makes sense.

We often travel with multiple pillows, just for this reason, because NOBODY ever gives guests 6 pillows.....for two people. Plus, nobody's pillows are as good as the ones that are "his".

Which brings me back to the Home Goods pillow aisle.

I sorted through every single pillow they had in that store, and left with the top 5 that the aisle had to offer. A couple of extra firm, (one being for me) and the rest, an array of support, so that at least one would work for Josh.

Now before this Sunday, I have to admit something totally gross. I haven't bought a new pillow since I was in college. Yes, I've come clean. My pillows, just really aren't.

I have always had this issue since I was a little girl. My dad gave me one of the pillows from his bed in exchange for finally being kicked out of his bed at the age of 7...ok, it was more like 10. That pillow was my favorite, and I slept with it every night until college. My roommate Jamie made-fun of me so often, that I broke down and bought all new pillows for my room. And since then....I have had the same pillow issue. I love my one pillow. It's comfortable and supports my head amazingly perfect.

I know, you're probably supposed to get a pillow once every year or six months...who knows? Not me obviously. The awful part is that when Josh and I combined households, my pillows from college were considered our "newest" bedroom pillows. The ones he moved into our family must be at least 12 years old. That is not an exaggeration...actually, probably more of an under-estimate. One of the pillows he uses is as flat as a pancake. It would actually be too flat for Flat Stanley. The others, are, well, totally disgusting. I don't know why I even let them in my bed.

So I came home with our new sheets, and new pillows. All excited that we would finally have a bed that I wasn't embarrassed for the cleaning lady to make.

And we sorted through all the old pillows. Josh decided he was going to only get rid of two of his. He literally wouldn't budge.

I decided I would set the example and toss mine in the garbage pile right away. Then, when he was carrying all the "throw-out" pillows down the stairs, I got a last quick glance of my blue, Ralph Lauren sleeping companion from college.

Begrudgingly, I said Josh..."keep mine too. I just can't do it. What if the new one isn't as good?" "Exactly." he said.

Independence Trip

2010-07-10T19:16:00.009-04:00

We were home for the fourth. Just Julie and I. I won't use the word amazing because it wasn't really this time. I liked being in FL, but it was hot and a tiring 7 hour drive each way alone almost killed me. Plus, apparently the red carpet at my mom's house only rolls out when Josh Stagner arrives. Julie and I were left to sleep on an air mattress and had Cheerios for breakfast....no comfy new bed and scrambled eggs for us!
We loved our company though. We did have a good time with my mom. She bought Julianna Toy Story blow-up toys for the pool and a package of toy cars. She thought it was heaven in FL. She adores calling my mom, granma, and she says it so well and often. She loves all our family and friends.
We had a great afternoon with my cousin and her son. Julie loves playing with him. They are only 9 months apart. We also spent lots of time with my dear friend Barbara and her daughter.
Nothing compared to watching the fireworks with Julie on the dock over the Halifax River. We saw the most amazing sunset, then the sky filled with lights all through Daytona, Ormond and Holly Hill across the river. We had the BEST spot in all of Volusia County.

When the city of Ormond Beach started their display, the sky went black and their show soloed the sky.

Julie was amazed. It was so magical watching her love the fireworks. I personally have always loved fireworks and 4th of July....just like my Dad. It was his favorite holiday because you got to have a great meal, beer and fireworks, without having to buy presents or plan too much. Stress free.
Julie pointed to each of her favorite colored booms and kept saying...ooooohhhhhh dat one. ooohhh look at date one, mommy She had the small crowd gathered on the dock laughing hysterically.
We drove home last Monday and I didn't feel the same unbearable sadness that I often feel when I leave home.
I know we'll be home again in just a few months for Labor Day and the time in between is becoming much more tolerable. 10 months into our GA residency, I finally have a few good friends and I have accepted that it will be our new home for quite some time. That Labor Day weekend will mark our one year anniversary in our new home of Atlanta.

Recovery

2010-06-20T20:25:00.006-04:00

I've recovered. Now don't get too alarmed. I haven't been hurt, or addicted or even depressed...OK maybe a little of that last one. I'm back to being able to write blogs for fun. I was seriously traumatized by my last slave-driving job, where 60 blog posts + a week was required and then some. A true writer shall not write that much, their brain turns into what's inside Julie's size 6 diapers once a day....and now that my brain's back, let's work on that diaper situation.
I have a new job. It's amazing, I LOVE it and I'm happy. That's all I'll say, except that I can still write, which I really wanted to do. It's just at a reasonable, not want to rip your hair out level. Plus, it's ultra-cool. I feel truly blessed right now.

Today is Father's Day. Happy one to you honey. I think you loved your day and the comfy recliner I hand-picked just for you. And that amazing 5 day vacation to FL, sans Julie and I must have been legen...wait for it....dary. I am declaring myself an amazing mother-o'-your-child.

You too are amazing. Thanks for all you do and for making me a better person and mother.

I missed my dad today, but oddly it was not the heart-wrenching horrible feeling that I've experienced every Father's Day since he's been gone. Maybe time is healing, or maybe it's just been a good couple of weeks. I'll let you know soon. Julianna helped distract from any feelings of grief today with her discontent and whining. Good job, sweetheart.

It was like she wanted to punish Josh for being away for a few days. She really showed him when she threw herself on the floor those three times. I've gotta work on her tact.

To punish Josh even more, we went to see Toy Story 3. Actually it was his idea and I think we all enjoyed it. This movie was Jules second movie ever (in a theater) and the first one she's made to the credits. And with that, came her father's best gift...to hell with the recliner and golf in FL, we now have a new weekend activity.

Happy Father's Day to all the wonderful daddys out there. Enjoy your day, and the US Open. Tiger is losing...WHOOT!

My Baby Turned Two

2010-05-22T01:26:00.024-04:00

This week has been filled with so many blessings. My Julianna was born two years ago on the 18th of May. Can you believe it? I really just can't. We had a wonderful weekend filled with a trip to the aquarium with Aunt C and a Chuck E Cheese Sunday with Aunt K.
I miss our friends and family. I cried, just like I thought I would. I wish we could have celebrated with all the people we love. Last year we had 40+ people at our home for a party. This year was a private affair. My loving and dear friends sent beautiful presents and sweet cards....they made me cry some more. My family spoiled her when they saw her earlier this month.
She's a lucky toddler. I'm a lucky mom, daughter, niece, grand-daughter, sister and friend.

Julianna, you amaze me everyday and I love you more than my heart hold. I love seeing you grow. I love being your mom and I thank you for filling my life with joy. You are so special.

Happy 2nd Birthday Sweet Girl!

Time

2010-05-15T23:08:00.005-04:00

I have been terribly rude. About 4 weeks ago I received my first blogging award from an amazing daddy blogger. It was kind, and I really was appreciative, but then I fell off the blogosphere, well kinda.
I've learned a lesson. Don't make your hobby your career.
Now, some of you (if there are any of you still out there) are probably thinking, wow this is really nonsense advice...everyone wants to do what they love to do. Wouldn't making a career out of your passion be amazing?
Maybe if you're a shopper, a cake tester, OK even a sports player...I GET that. Maybe anything but writing, which unlike popular belief, I actually still love to do. Although, I've discovered too much of a good thing is bad, and I've totally overloaded. Hence my horrible rudeness and lackadaisical response to thanking and fulfilling the obligation of my blogging award.
Thank you This Daddy, a fellow Atlanta parent/ former reader of mine :)

What's the saying? Better late then never, right? To accept this really cool award I am supposed to list ten honest things about me and also give away this award to ten other bloggers. I can fulfill the first half, but I bet almost the whole blogging community has received this award by now. So instead, I'd like to commit that I will be back on here more regularly. Things are changing in a good way.

So here goes....
10. I quit my job last week. There will be more to come about some new changes soon.

9. Josh and I aren't married. This is really no secret if you have read my "About me" section. However, I often say "my husband" when I speak about him. It's something we want to do when the time is right. Josh's mom thinks it's because I have too many assets (ie. houses) that I don't want to share with him. Hysterical. I don't think she's heard about the FL housing market. My mom thinks it's because Josh doesn't want to commit. They are both really wrong. Please let me never be a mom like that.

8. I love Josh and Julie more than anything else in life. They are my strength and happiness all rolled into two.

7. I am feeling so guilty that Julie will not have more friends and family here for her 2nd birthday party tomorrow. I planned so horribly this year and the guilt is just as horrible. I miss our Florida family and friends more than ever this week. Last year we had so many people who love us at Julie's first birthday bash. I will be crying on Tuesday. (Thanks Aunt Kenzie for coming<3)>

6. I want to take a vacation this summer. Not to FL, or to visit family. I want to go to a new place. I haven't traveled much. Vegas would be super cool.

5. I started therapy in March and quit this month. I found it a hassle to schedule time to go. My therapist said that I shouldn't find a task as small as scheduling an appointment a hassle. I didn't like that. I'll deal with all my guilty working mom/ miss my dad/ perfectionist issues at a later date.

4. I didn't paint my nails a dark color.

3. I can't decide if I want another baby. And if we let Josh decide for us, the answer will definitely be "no" without even a second thought. We can almost see the light and Julie's staying up until 12am almost every night this week has reminded us how much we love sleep.

2. I started collecting shoes for my non-profit organization. I need help figuring out what to do with them.

1. I am happy. I thank God for this every day.

Thanks again This Daddy. I really did love my award.

A Draft Day Poem

2010-04-22T16:56:00.004-04:00

Sorry I've been MIA. Life gets so busy!

As you all may know the NFL draft is on tonight. It's Josh's most favorite TV event of the year. I think more than the Super Bowl. We'll be huddled on the couch with baby asleep by 8:00pm (hopefully). I can't wait!

I wrote this poem of behalf of the draft.....Enjoy!

Oh NFL I love you so.
Just thought that I should let you know.

Tonight teams will pick newbies.
Who’ll play next year, well, hopefully.

I have one thing I’d like to see.
12 first round picks for the Jets please.

I know this may be a lot to ask.
But you’re the only one up for the task.

And if you could include my Gator love
This mom would know it was meant from above.

For if they win all the games.
Everyone will know their names.

And I’ll travel to Dallas next February.
To watch my team win the Vince Lombardi.

Top 3 Thursday: Celebrity Crushes

2010-04-14T22:38:00.005-04:00

Each week, Confessions From a Working Mom and The (Un)Experienced Mom pick a category, then ask you to share your Top 3 thoughts on it.

This week, they want to know...

Who are your Top 3 "guilty" celebrity crushes?

Glad to finally be participating this week! And I'm an hour early. Do I get extra points for that?
This one is kinda tough for me. I am embarrassed about my crushes, but had to be completely honest because Josh will tell you....I am a HORRIBLE liar. So here goes....

#3- Adam Duritz- Forget looks. This guy has the most amazing voice and is by FAR my favorite song writer ever. In case you don't know, he is the lead singer for the Counting Crows. I think the genius of his lyrics makes him so attractive sans the drug use and beard. He may be one of the coolest men to grace a stage. Plus, did you know he dated Courtney Cox and Jennifer Aniston?

#2- Ray Liotta- I was totally in love with him when I first saw Goodfellas and my crush has stuck. I have seen almost all of his horrible movies. Remember Turbulance? But let's not forget the good ones like Field of Dreams. For my own curiousity, I just looked up his birthday and saw that he was born only a year after my father....that just CAN'T be! I didn't think I could feel any worse about this crush.

#1- Wayne Chrebet- Say who? Hardly anybody in the world knows who this man is, but he is a celebrity in his own right to most Jet fans. He hailed from Hofstra in the 90's to become the one of the Jet's best wide receivers ever. I met him once, in Miami. I couldn't talk because I was so star struck. I had a poster of him up in my room throughout most of my college days and I still have his cereal, jersey and autobiography (Every Down, Every Distance My Journey to the NFL). I also was one of only about 500 people in his fan club. I wonder what he's up to now...hopefully planning his return to commentary on ESPN!

So there you have it, those are my celebrity crushes. Please do not judge or ask me to seek advice for adoring much older men. It's just a thing and I am OK with that. Would it have been better if I said that Twilight guy and Timmy T? I think not :)

Here Comes the Sun

2010-04-10T11:47:00.006-04:00

We came home from our vacation late Wednesday evening. It was amazing to be home. The relaxation was much needed and well-deserved. And even though we had to help Josh's mom move while we were in FL, we had a great time and loved every minute of it.

Julie loved seeing my mom, she missed her so much. I loved seeing her too and being around family and friends, who are just like family, felt unbelievably amazing. I wish had more time to see everyone we missed.

I still have a hard time believing that I don't live there anymore. Atlanta is nice, but crowded, fast-paced and land-locked.

I missed my beach.

The first morning we were there, I went down to the shore, breathed in the salt air, took a sigh of relief and knew that I'm alright. My motivation from last month's high has been quickly drifting from the stresses of every day life. I need rejuvenation and I got it. I know I have something to look forward to. Our home is more beautiful than ever, and I know one day we'll be able to return.

Being home let me reach a spiritual place that I haven't been in a while. We went to church in OUR church, it's amazing what that can do to you.

I watched the most amazing sunrise solo while Josh and our baby slept in. There is no peace like that anywhere else in the world.

I took Julie to visit my dad's grave. We talked about him. She watched me cry as she stomped on his plaque. It's the closest I'll ever come to spending time with the two of them together.

I wish we could have stayed. Six days wasn't enough. But it let me see the Sun.

Hairy Situation

2010-03-30T21:24:00.006-04:00

This is not wordless Tuesday, I just needed to post some pictures to prove my point. See above. Anything look the same? Yes, I know she is marvelous, and beautiful and she does have gorgeous blue eyes from that mailman. Now look up......a little more. See that mop on Julie's head?

Please help.

After months of Julianna's life complaining about how bald she is, her hair has finally decided to embrace the world and start growing. I have something to comb, her shampoo doesn't last six months anymore and all those cute clips are now usable.

Except that her hair is a huge disaster. All the time.

She wakes up with bed head, I try to comb it but to no avail and it ends up worse. See that poofy mess in the back? Yep, that's lovely. Even after a bath, as soon as it dries, it turns into a poof ball full of fine baby hair, that sticks up everywhere.

When we took Christmas pictures a few months back, I had two separate people ask me why her hair was so messy in the portraits....I actually thought it looked good that day.

I really can't understand it. How did this happen to my child?

You may want to stop reading for a few lines so you don't HATE me, but here goes....

I have beautiful hair. It's kinda perfect really. It's naturally curly, long, not tangly or frizzy, easy to maintain and it always looks great. Hair is never a worry of mine and I get compliments on it ALL the time. Now don't worry, the same wonderful God that gave me heavenly hair, also gave me thunder thighs, a curved-up nose and the ugliest feet in the world. We're even now, for all you hair envy people.

It never occurred to me that I could ever have a daughter with hair (or lack there of) issues. She will be 2 in May and all Julianna wants for her birthday is a ponytail.

In the meantime, what am I to do with such a mess? We've tried combing it. To only have it separate into strings across her forehead. Then for a few days, I implemented a strict "no brushing" rule, I was determined to let those curls form. After a few days, her knots rivaled Bob Marley dreads.

I am at my wit's end and in the meantime it keeps getting worse. I'm almost to the point where I don't care...except that I do....I really do.

I'd almost settle going back to this. At least then it stayed in place.

Furrys Invade a Mom's Night Out

2010-03-27T21:33:00.008-04:00

I can count on one hand how many times I've been out with my girlfriends since Jules has been born. In all honestly, it's not something that's as fun as it used to be. I don't really enjoy drinking and I'd rather be sleeping by 10.

Last night after having a few glasses of wine with some friends, who were over our house for dinner and Trivia Pursuit, my friend Kenzie and I decided to go out. It was the perfect opportunity because my old boss was in town from FL and my other friend, Jenn, was going too. So off to downtown Atlanta we went, dolled-up and ready for fun.

We met my friends at the bar in the Marriot Marquis in downtown Atlanta. I had a huge surprise seeing an old friend from high school who ironically was traveling with my old boss. Small world. But that wasn't the weirdest thing that happened last night.

Earlier in the day, my friend at work shared with me this link about a unfamiliar phenomenon. Have you ever heard of a Furry? Not to be confused with a Flurry as I giddily tweeted last night after one too many Sapphire and tonics.

Ironically we were directly next to the hotel hosting FurryCon, a huge national convention for people who like to dress-up as, um, animals, to, you know, have s-e-x. I know you can say it.....Ewwwwww. I did last night, a lot.

Picture college mascots without the branding. Big stuffed costumes with people frolicking inside.

I. Could. Not. Believe. My.Eyes.

After some research today, I found out these people are obsessed with anthropomorphics and not ALL dress-up for sexual purposes. Apparently only about 30%.... I wonder who gathered this statistic.

At the bar this dog came-up by himself, ordered a drink and sat at the bar. He talked, in fact one of the weirdest things was that his dog mouth actually moved. People, including Kenzie, took pictures with him. He was like a mini-celeb, which is precisely why these pervs probably dress-up like that. Kenzie heard him get propositioned from a couple. He had a name tag that said "DogBomb."

It was way too much for this conservative housewife. Very creepy.

He eventually left and we finished our night out at the bar. As Kenzie and I tried to find the back entrance to Marriot we stumbled across a walkway to the side of the street our parking garage was on. Little did we know that the walkway led to the hotel where the Furry convention was taking place.

It was 2:00am in the morning and these adults were dressed-up all over this hotel. A lime green mouse that squeaked at us, lots of dogs, a guy dressed like the Joker from Batman and people with tails pinned to the back of their pants.

I don't think I've ever laughed so hard in my life. I don't know why these people do what they do, no judgement here....well not, that I'm willing to openly admit. I will say this however, based on the people with their "masks-off", the costumes may actually help them get laid. It was a gathering of the rejects from the Star Trek conventions.

This run-in made for an interesting night, I'm glad I finally got out to downtown Atlanta. Maybe I should get out in this big city more often. You never know what you may see. I do know that I would never have experienced this in Daytona. Although I am also sure some of the people who traveled to this conference must have been from Florida.

I must say this was not what I was talking about when I posted about stepping-out of the box a few posts ago. Maybe now I don't have to paint my nails :)

Kenzie with "DogBomb" Taken with my Blackberry.

Ben and Jerry's: A Photo Essay

2010-03-23T22:01:00.011-04:00

Julie and I are both sick tonight so this is going to be short and "sweet". Pun intended. Of course our ailments did not stop us from participating in Ben and Jerry's Free Cone Day.

Ben and Jerry's is clearly one of the perks of living in Atlanta. YUMMY. We stopped at the location on Windward Parkway right after I picked up Julianna from daycare......yes, before dinner. I know... I win "Mother of the Year." Did I mention I'm sick?

Julie wins "Cutest Recipient of Free a Cone."

Thank you Ben and Jerry!

Inspiration Part 2

2010-03-19T21:28:00.005-04:00

Have you ever pressed send on an email and then quickly regretted it? I just become an a-hole customer.
Moreover, it was to a Realtor, even worse. However, in my defense, it was for my sister, not me and I needed to give her a birthday present since I haven't sent anything to Hawaii. BTW Gina, I just found out today that Hawaiians don't believe in birthday presents...lucky for me ;)

And even though I feel so guilty right now, I knew it had to be done. My sister really needs to sell her house and a month of messages with no call backs is good reason for an a-hole email if you ask me, especially since I have a passion for customer service.

OK now that I got that off my chest, are you ready for some more inspiring stuff?! I hope my banter hasn't turned you away.

So here I am, out-of-my-box with endless possibilities of things I want to do to better myself, my family and the world.

I am ready to start some projects that I thought I could never do because they were daring, risky or things I felt like I couldn't accomplish. Some are big and some are small. But nonetheless, they are important to me. My conservative nature has been turned upside down and inside out and I am inspired!

Tomorrow, I start one rather awesome project. I am going to start looking in garage sales, stores and consignment shops for discounted shoes. I have always wanted to give away shoes to the needy. It's an idea I've had for a long time. Since my college days at Nine West, when shoes were my biggest passion (notice it was not writing or journalism). I decided then that no one should go without shoes. But then I never did anything with my idea. It's time.

I also started back my 6:30am workouts this week. I will attend a yoga class this month. I will paint my finger nails a dark color. I will go to a new church, where I don't know anyone. I will book my flight to NYC for my trip this summer. I am finally calling that cleaning lady tomorrow.

These are all things I emotionally could not have done a few weeks ago. Small things but stepping-out of my comfort zone. A blog post and a one-day tryout for a show and here I am, motivated to do better and be better. Isn't that amazing?

Is there anything you've held-off on doing for one reason or another?

Oh and if you're still wondering what the show was...it was the Biggest Loser. I had sooooo much fun trying out that I would do it again in a heart beat. I met amazing people from all over. And I don't know if this a good thing or not, but a lot of people there told me I wasn't fat enough to be there. That gave me a good laugh too.

Inspiration Part 1

2010-03-17T20:50:00.008-04:00

This is probably going to be a two-parter because I have a A LOT I want to say about something that's been going on. Really, I know that's nothing new that I have a lot to say, but I am really passionate about something right now.

I read a lot. Blogs not books. In all honestly I can't remember the last time I have read a whole book...I know, shame on me. I was reading one of my favorite writers about two weeks ago and she talked about going a trip that she didn't take. She wanted to, but just couldn't.

Her words struck a cord.

I have never, ever been a daredevil. I'm actually very cautious when it comes to everything. I haven't traveled much, never out of the country. I went to college only two hours away from home for a reason. And if it wasn't for Josh, I probably would have never have moved out of the state of Florida. I work in the field that I love and went to school for, I drive a safe car...never fast, I don't dye my hair, I prefer the suburbs and I can bank on most given nights in my home.

I'm a true conservative. In every form of the word.

I think one of the craziest things I've ever done was buy a home during the peak of the Florida real estate boom. Whhhoooooo *hands flailing in the air* Crazy lady does NOT that make and besides... we all know how well that turned out.

Now through my years of conservation I have always been a dreamer. A visualizer. I truly believe in the power of thought. Otherwise, I wouldn't have everything I have today. And I feel like I have worked hard and most importantly have believed in myself. But there are MANY things that I have thought and visualized that I have emotionally held myself back from doing.

The list is endless really, from small to big and bigger.

I don't know if it's been because I have been too scared, cautious, rational, lazy, heartless or all of the above, to try something new.

This writer moved me to do something I never would have done. Her eloquence in explaining how she felt, forced me to move on my thoughts. And the momentum has continued and has even spread to someone else. Now, I want to keep it going.

I started kinda small when I think about it. What I did last weekend wasn't a huge feat. But it kinda was. A mom who never does anything out of the ordinary, who's lived a rather typical life and who isn't flashy in anyway, finally got the nerve to step out of her comfort zone....And HAD A BLAST doing it.

I'm inspired and I plan to do more things like that. I feel like the possibilities may be endless.

By now you're probably wondering what small, huge, crazy, unimaginable thing it was...
I drove 300 miles to try out for a reality TV show. *Important note* I didn't make it. But this inspiration is going to change my life anyway.

Top 3 Thursday: Parenthood

2010-03-11T21:05:00.008-05:00

Each week, Confessions From a Working Mom and The (Un)Experienced Mom pick a category, then ask you to share your Top 3 thoughts on it.

This week, they want to know...

What are your Top 3 favorite things about being a parent?

OK I know this is going to sound so cliche, but this one has been hard for me because there are so MANY things I love about being a parent. The old 24 year-old me just threw-up a little BTW.

It took all day but I finally decided....

#3) Seeing Julie's expressions, traits and personality that mirror Josh and I. It's amazing to have a little piece of both of us in one amazing little girl. I still look at her some days and can't believe what a blessing we have and the miracle of life.

#2) Teaching Julie everything in life from new words to colors. Seeing her soak it all in and retain everything makes me so proud of her and myself. I never thought I would be a mom and all of her little accomplishments remind me that I was meant to a mother. She has taught me so much too.

#1) Julianna's kisses and hugs. I have never loved to snuggle with anyone more in life. Her sweet smell and tiny hands touching my face. We are an affectionate family and I hope she always wants to kiss her mommy.

Maid to Perfection

2010-03-10T21:56:00.008-05:00

I have been tired lately. Don't know what it is, but every night after Julie goes to bed, I just can't get motivated to clean, work, organize and pay bills, work-out, do laundry, etc ...you know all the things a working mom is always behind on, basically everything.

I have realized that I need some help in the cleaning dept. I must say I am a sicko-perfectionist when it comes to the house and the last few weeks have driven me crazy. BTW my college roommate is laughing her butt off right now...people change, you know.

Josh has offered that I solicit some help and hire a cleaner. I just can't do it. For several reasons, but mostly for feeling like a failure and not fully functioning on all of my roles as a mother. Does that sound crazy?

I even have a phone number to someone a friend at work uses. The lady is very trustworthy, so that's not the issue. The number has been sitting in my email box for months. What's wrong with me?

And what makes me feel even more guilty and unmotivated is that there are millions of single parents out there doing it ALL, with no help, and without the financial stability to even dream about help. I know because my Dad was one of them.

We are so fortunate that we can swing it, yet I procrastinate and make myself feel like I am drowning in my daily tasks.

Here's my list of things that have been making me happy lately. Because as a wise friend said today on her Facebook page. There is no key to happiness. The door is open. Come on in....

1. American Idol, and watching it with Josh and laughing. Plus looking at that hawt Casey James.

2. The Julianna dvd's Josh finally had made for me after months (21 to be exact) of nagging. I finally have videos of her, I can't believe it. I watched her first birthday last night and cried. (I'm kinda emotional lately)

3. Steaz Zero calorie sparkling green tea. It's helping me give up my Diet Coke obsession. Well kinda.

4. Julie's obsession with Elmo and stickers. I am so proud she is choosing her own hobbies these days.

5. Talking on the phone with friends from FL. It makes me miss it so much. But also knowing that YES, we are going home for Easter!

6. My new handbag that isn't as deep as the Grand Canyon. I can actually find stuff. And it was a great deal!

7. Knowing my sister is happy with her move to Hawaii.

8. Josh's obsession with Facebook Scrabble. This allows me more time to peruse the blogosphere at night without feeling guilty for being the only one on the computer.

9. The fact that Julie bumped her head tonight on our headboard and she said..."I'm OK Mommy" She barely flinched and it was quite a thump. She's a strong little lady.

10. Writing, of course. And reading about other amazing moms.

Terrible Two Rears Its Ugly Head

2010-03-06T20:55:00.004-05:00

Let's talk about personality. Because it's becoming quite the problem lately.

Julie has decided that she's old enough to raise herself. Nothing I say is obviously good advice and she just doesn't listen.

Julie, sit on the couch don't stand. Ignore.
Julie, you can't go outside it's too cold and your nose is runny. "Outside Mommy"
Julie, please don't throw food because you're going to get a time-out again. Heave-ho.

According to my mom that's nothing, and paybacks are a bitch. I've decided that must be the joy of grand-motherhood. I'll look forward to those days....if Jules makes it past 2. Because at this rate, I may not dare tell her that it's not safe to cross the street without looking. She'll go prancing out on the highway. Just because I said not to.

I've come to learn recently that it's hard to reason with a 21-month-old. I'm also constantly questioning my parenting skills. It's so hard to know when to give in, when not to, how to say no, when to say no, how to set limits, and on and on and on.

Oh, but the joys of watching her learn new words and all things has been beyond amazing. It's what keeps me in adoration.

For instance, our nap this afternoon. Julie and I had a snugly one after a busy morning at the park, lunch-out and shopping for new shoes for Josh. She woke-up before I did, and gently tapped my face and said "mommy you sleep". I opened one eye to the biggest, cutest smile in the world. She then said, "night night" and gave me a kiss.

That makes-up for any and all shoe prints on my couch.

Bunnies, Buds and More

2010-03-04T22:49:00.005-05:00

Spring is one of my favorite times of year. Well at least in Florida it was. The buds of all the flowers, planning my garden, Spring break on the beach and Easter. I'm sure an Atlanta Spring will be even more beautiful, if I survive my allergies.

Easter is BY FAR my favorite holiday. Way less stress than Christmas, with as much, if not more spiritual meaning. I love Easter baskets and the Passion and Palm Sunday and coloring eggs. Everything about Easter is great. I think last year I had more decor on the outside of our house for Easter than the December holidays.

When I was a kid, my cousins from NC would always come to visit. We would dress-up in our beautiful dresses, go to church and indulge in jelly beans and chocolate bunnies. Sometimes we'd have brunch out at a fancy restaurant and sometimes my grandma would cook an amazing meal.
I had the same Easter basket every year. It was wood, multi-colored and my Dad would fill it with candy galore.

He would also be an expert egg-hider and would sometimes put dollar bills in the plastic eggs. I loved my Easter Bunny. I had the best. I am still amazed at how well my dad made holidays on his very low budget and without a female influence.

My mom had her own shining moment for Easter. She would always make the pupa cu l'ovas. She formed these spectacular Italian dough pastries into bunny shapes with a hard boiled colored eggs inside. I'll have to take a picture of one this year.
Oh and the St. Joseph's pastries. Yep, I just really love all things about Easter....

Julie's first Easter was one of my favorites to date. I loved being the Easter bunny and I loved bringing her to church in Daytona, well besides the puking. This year will be even better. I'm not sure if we're going home yet...I'm praying that we get to. However, even if we stay, it will be fun since Julie understands so much more this year.

And in preparation, the kid in me splurged last weekend and bought almost every Easter book that Target had on its shelves. I want Julianna to start getting excited too. Maybe Easter will be her favorite just like her mama's.

The Last Great Website

2010-03-01T21:49:00.003-05:00

So I was talking with a friend the other day and we agreed that the Internet is dead. It is no longer an exit from reality nor a source of interesting entertainment. It has become the encyclopedia set we had on the bookshelves in my house growing up and a way to look up phone numbers instead of using the phone book. But as a source of entertainment, the Internet is dead. I remember back in 1996 when I was first exposed to the Internet on AOL. My roommates and I would literally fight for who was on the computer that evening. Someone would be up till 4 in the morning trying to pick up girls in chat rooms. It was a sad attempt at creating a life, but it was entertaining and actually worked if you were looking to hook up. I was 18 at the time, so certainly it played its course in my development. :-) I think I signed online to chat on AOL/AIM every day for about eight years! I might have been the last person on Earth to actually stop paying for an AOL account :-( Soon after the instant messaging faded, there was the game sites and Mahjong, Monopoly and the Nintendo emulators. Don't forget online chess and Yahoo pool. Years past and there was streaming movies along with YouTube and home videos. Online poker became a hit along with sites dedicated to the latest news and gossip on people I don't like to watch on television, yet loved to read about on the net. It was just a great way to kill some time when there was nothing else to do. The net always provided me with something to occupy myself with, especially at employers who just didn't provide me with enough excitement to work a true eight hour day.

That leads me up to today. When I turn my computer on and complete checking my work and personal email, I have little to be excited about on the Internet. Outside keeping up with box scores and the running headlines on ESPN.com, I cannot even think of a site that I wish to visit. I think I have exhausted the net for all it was ever worth. The net has gone from being a friend that entertained me to a resource I use for directions, phone numbers and the occasional newspaper article. I don't think I am the only one who feels this way so I took one final stab at being proven wrong and googled "The last great website." The #1 site was http://www.iditarod.com/ the official site for the worlds foremost sled race. I think that says it all.

My significant other Annie feels otherwise. She has found a fantastic hobby in blogging about our family. She has always been passionate about writing and has now found her outlet along with 22,000 other mothers. The goal is to share our unique experiences with others in cyberland. The problem is, we are about as unique as one piece of celery is to another. (Sorry about the bad analogy, we've been watching too many episodes of the Wonder Pets.) I agreed to assist her in contributing to "our" blog about four months ago yet have only written two passages so far. I know this because she reminds me about every other day about my commitment to writing on the blog. The problem is I don't enjoy turning on my computer anymore when I get home. The Net has nothing to offer me and 90% of the time I turn my computer on, its for homework or real work. The computer means work for me. But, I do need to keep my word to her and help get "our" blog up to triple digit viewers. Maybe if I start contributing, one of my friends will actually read it!

So here is #3 Annie! Its bland and deeply uninteresting, but its a new start! Maybe this will finally give me something to look forward to on the net again.

Break-Time

2010-03-01T20:53:00.006-05:00

I needed a few days off. A break. From blogging and writing and the beaming light of my laptop glowing in my room late at night.

It's been nice, and I needed to live life a bit so I could write about it a lot.

It's not here so much that's been sucking my creative juices, it's been work, where I write all day....which I love! However, it can be challenging to come-up with a post for 20+ blogs a week. BTW, times that by three. See why I needed a break?

We had the most amazing weekend. A relaxing Friday evening that involved a nice dinner out at a local Mexican restaurant in Alpharetta. Julie actually behaved quite well, nothing a little ice cream wouldn't fix, that is. Then Saturday, since Josh had to work, I took Julie shopping early in the morning. We had breakfast at Panera, followed by a trip to Target and Aldi for groceries. After Josh came home, we went to Mableton, GA for a birthday party for Josh's college friend's son.
It was one of the cutest parties I've ever been too. A train theme, lots of tots and good cake. Three years ago it would have been a nightmare for me, well, except for the cake. But I really loved it, almost as much as Jules did.

To end our fun-filled Saturday, we had the best family dinner and played cards at a friend's house. It was the most fun I've had in a while. Julie really loved my friend's daughter, she talked about her the whole next day. We finally found a babysitter!

Sunday was more relaxing, cleaning and more shopping at the North Point Mall.

It was the formula for just what I needed...a break to recharge my mom battery. And I didn't look at my computer once, well until Sunday night, when I bought my BlogHer ticket!

And since I missed Top 3 Thursday at Confessions From a Working Mom. Here goes. Better late than never. I couldn't miss this question, I just needed a break to remind myself why....

What are the top 3 reasons why you blog?

1. I couldn't have said it better myself.... "I started this blog to keep order in my life. Make lists, keep positive, vent, be productive. It's called Self-Indulgence Take Two because I really think blogging is very selfish and self-fulfilling at the same time...the Take Two part is because at one point I stopped writing on here, I never finish anything I start."

That was then this is now....

2. I blog to connect with other women. Mostly moms. I love connecting with people who face the same challenges, joys, fears and accomplishments as I do. It's a way to connect with new friends and keep our old friends in FL updated on our life in Atlanta.

3. For money. Obviously, not here...the only and sole purpose of this blog is for personal reasons. However, since I've become a personal blogger and with our move, came a new career for me. And now I get paid to blog. It's pretty cool.

Julie Needs a Time-Out!

2010-02-24T22:27:00.016-05:00

Monday through Friday I unfortunately spend only about two hours with Julianna. I plunge through Atlanta traffic after leaving work around 5:15 or so, and arrive at Julie's daycare, only 12 miles away, at 6:00pm. It bothers me profusely some days, but it's what our schedule is right now, so I deal with it.

From there, depending on if I'm cooking lavishly, getting take-out, or my fav, heating leftovers, I scramble to get her fed or relax and soak-in every second with her until Josh gets home from work and we bathe her, read some books, then she heads-off to bed around 8:00. Although she's been pushing it until 8:30 some nights lately, which I secretly really don't mind.

Tonight was a leftover night since I made a ton of southern style chicken and rice last night. TG, because the cooking nights usually leave me feeling guilty about not giving her more attention during this treasured time. We played with Dawn dish soap bubbles in the kitchen and did a photo shoot, despite my allergies and runny eyes from the first-signs of spring. Apparently, Georgia allergy-season may leave me blind.

The night was pretty relaxed and fun, until it became the eventful night of a first. Julie had her first time-out tonight.

I will admit this was probably quite overdue.

She's an overall pretty great toddler. Well-behaved, she listens pretty good for a 20 month-old and when she is bad, we usually reprimand her verbally, and move on. The problem is, her testing is becoming more frequent and a lot worse...basically it's time for some real discipline. I'm so worried that as an only-child, she'll become a spoiled, bratty kid, who gets away with way murder.

It's really odd that Josh and I have not discussed it much, but we have the same views about discipline. We both agree that we will never, ever hit or even smack a little hand. It's not that I have a problem with parents who do, it's just not right for our family. I haven't read a million parenting books to know why I formed this opinion, I just have, and Josh was a childhood development major, so he's probably read way too many books about why he chooses not to.

So after she threw her food at me, on purpose, not in a loving/joking way. We both knew a little no-no just wouldn't work. It was the third time this week.

Josh took the initiative and we just glanced at each other kinda knowing what the other was thinking. Josh announced it was time-out time and he carried her up to her crib. We made her sit there in quiet for about 2 minutes. She was crying, but we both whispered how shocking it was that she wasn't wailing her head-off. At the 2 minute mark, I said "OK it's time, I want to be the hero"... so up the stairs I went to get my baby.

As soon as she saw me, the total WAILING started. "Time-out is over now, Mommy's here, it's OK baby" upon which she threw herself in the corner of the other side of the crib and yelled DADDY!!

WTF, does she not remember who PUT her in the timeout vs. who creatively mixed water and Dawn to make the coolest kitchen bubbles ever! Making my point from the last post even more prevalent.

Happy girl before Daddy gets home. And before time-outs and temper tantrums.

This is what my right eye looks like by the end of the day from tearing so much. Everyone at work...I'm not crying, it's allergies :)

In a rare photo opp these days....Mommy and Julianna!

Dad's Girl

2010-02-22T21:28:00.007-05:00

It's so hard to understand why Julie cries when Josh leaves the room sometimes.

It's so hard to know why when she gets hurt, she wants to be held in her Daddy's arms.

It's so hard to accept that she'll run past me every time we both pick her up from daycare.

It's so hard to expect that she won't laugh at my same silly face or song.

Until I was on the phone with my cousin Diana last night.

She had dinner with my mom and sister in Daytona yesterday. She told me they missed me and talked about me at during their meal. They retold stories about my toddler days. The time I threw myself down the stairs at 18 months-old because my daddy left to play cards. The time I knocked down our Christmas tree because I was upset my dad had to work. These are classics that my mom always tells.

It made me realize that Julie and I have something important in common, how could I NOT know why, or accept or expect anything less.

I'm proud she's just LIKE me and I've got to keep that in mind. After all, her dad is amazing, just like my dad was. How could she not be a daddy's girl? Plus, how could you not adore a man who just asked if I'd like to watch Oprah during his beloved 24.

So Grateful

2010-02-21T00:19:00.004-05:00

I haven't made a list like this in quite some time. It's long overdue.

Today I am grateful for....

1. Josh and his commitment to our family, his job and education.

2. Julie for all her new words and ability to always smile, even after a tantrum. Her latest cute word.... Yesssshhh.

3. The beautiful sun and day we had in Atlanta. It gave me hope that I may actually survive this crummy winter.

4. My dad's old Gator t-shirt. I wish it still had his scent, but it's oh so comfy.

5. The company of great friends :)

6. The fact that I have not changed a diaper all weekend, unless you include bath-time tonight. Thanks Josh!!

7. The new awesome park we found only 4 blocks from our home. And it only took 5 months to find.

8. My grandmother's voicemails.

9. My sister's happiness today.

1o. All my family and friends, including new ones. God has given me so many blessings.

Time for TV

2010-02-18T15:07:00.005-05:00

From one of my new favorite blogs Confessions From a Working Mom I bring you...

Each week, Confessions From a Working Mom and The(Un)Experienced Mom pick a category, then ask you to share your Top 3 thoughts on it. Play along with them! And since I'm home from work, I'm playing too!

This week.... What are your Top 3 favorite TV shows?

Of course like any working mom, I don't have a ton of TV time. However, on PTO days like today, I have time to catch-up on my dvr. Of course besides sleep and trying to get over this super obnoxious head cold. Here's what I'll be watching as I lay motionless on my couch until 5:30 when I pick-up Julie and start freaking out because I'm behind on work. Oh and did I mention today would have been a perfect day to schedule that cleaner I've been meaning to call....

3. Oprah- Judge me all you want. She's been a staple in my life since I was 8. Yes, I know her show is ending and no, I'm not excited about her new network. I'm not huge fan of change or feeling like I have 24 hours of TV to catch up on daily vs. just an hour on ABC.

2. The Office- I have Josh to thank for this one. He's the TV buff in the family and got me on board to all the cool shows when we started dating. I cried during the Pam and Jim wedding. I heart them and LOVE laughing every Thursday.

1. How I Met Your Mother- Because of this show, I think Doogy Howser's my BFF and he's super hawt. This is another one Josh introduced me to, when I was vomit-free since 93, damn morning sickness. Run out and buy all the seasons to catch-up now. This way you'll get my joke.

Reflections

2010-02-16T21:19:00.008-05:00

I must say we've always been blessed with a baby that goes to sleep fairly easy. Since about 4 months old we've simply put Julie in her crib, walked away, let her cry for a couple of minutes and miraculously she falls asleep.

We've never had to rock her, or let her fall asleep in our bed, or make her cry past ten minutes....ok, so maybe that last one's a lie, there may have been a FEW times. Thankfully, not many, because that just really and truly breaks my heart.

Which brings us to this week of February 14th, 2010. A week that has started in a new tradition. Josh puts her in her crib, she cries and cries and cries. I just can't take it! Especially because of the coughing and ear infections. So up to her room I tiptoe and she immediately stops when I enter. I give her a hug and a kiss on the forehead, while leaving her in her crib. Then I take a seat in the glider in her room that we've barely used.

It's amazing how calm she gets. It's amazing how calm I get. That 10-15 minutes is becoming my favorite part of the day.

It's the first-time I relax after working, dinner, bath-time and clean-up. The soft glow of the night light on the mint walls is therapeutic. And it's priceless to watch my little girl lay so calm. She is so sweet as she drifts away, breathing heavily from her cold and snuggling with her blankets. I think she likes having me in there too.

And while I rock, I relax and have time to think. I remember her old nursery in FL. I picture the yellow walls and the extra 10 feet of space. I think about the day Josh put together the rocker in our other old little house in FL, when I was about 8 months pregnant. Boy, we've moved a lot! I remember holding my little baby in one arm, in that same glider, the day we came home from the hospital. I also imagine what it might be like to hold another baby in it one day.

My mind goes from here to there. All happy thoughts and reflections. Last night, I wondered how much longer her room would be all yellow and green. When I was pregnant, I didn't want any pink because I knew that after she turned 2, pink would rule our lives. Even then I knew I'd have a girly-girl.

I bought a pink princess wall hanging last summer in anticipation. I think we're almost ready for it.

With that, I also think of everything that has changed and everything that will inevitably change the next year ahead with a two-year-old. I am reminded of all the great times of the last two years and I reflect on how blessed I am to have my Julie and Josh.

I wonder how life would be different if we stayed in FL, it would almost be time to start planning my spring garden. I picture past days with my dad and nights-out with girlfriends. It's truly an amazing ten minutes. And when the breathing gets heavier, I know it's time. I tiptoe out of her room again, with a huge smile on my face and with hopes to do it again tomorrow.

Winter Wonderland

2010-02-13T11:26:00.016-05:00

Yesterday around 2:00pm it started to snow in Atlanta, a lot. I wrote about snow a few weeks back, but that was nothing! I couldn't believe all the snow and how fast it was coming down.

It was so much fun and we snapped a few pics outside, but unfortunately, we had to keep Julianna inside for most of the afternoon because she has double ear infections...again. Josh is the one who really made-up this rule, I would have been a really bad mom and would have let her play all she wanted to.... It's a good thing she has him.

So I played a outside by myself, after all I NEVER got to do that as a kid. I even built a little pathetic snowman with Josh's help. I compacted my first snowball and threw it at our house. Julie thought that was hysterical looking out from the window

This morning when we woke up the sun was shining beautifully on the winter wonderland of our street. We bundled up our baby and took a walk. It was one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen. I've posted some pics below, but if you want to see more visit my Facebook page.

You may notice that Julie is being held in every pic. She was terrified to touch the ground with her own feet. She's such a wimp and that took care of any ideas we had for snow angels.

Now, the dilemma is to figure out what to do all weekend since we're stuck in the house because of the crummy road conditions. We made Valentine's Day cupcakes and let Julie decorate them with sprinkles, but it didn't last too long because HELLO a 20 month-old with choc cupcakes, of course she wanted to just eat them.

We have another 36 hours of the weekend left. I hope Josh has some ideas.

Here's my little snow man. He has M&M eyes and we couldn't find a scarf small enough for his little head.

This is our backyard during the snow. See it falling!

This is the big tree in front of our house. It's so pretty.

Our street last night.

After I convinced Josh to let her outside for just a few minutes.

See those tracks, those are mine!

Julie looks amused.

Our house covered in snow.

Date Night

2010-02-11T23:02:00.007-05:00

Three years ago, when I was single and living on the 11th floor of one of the most amazing condo buildings in Daytona Beach Shores, I had an unexpected date with an old acquaintance. He was in town for the day and asked if we could see each other. I had no other plans that Sunday, except to maybe have a margarita by my beach-side pool with my best friend Kristin, so I said sure.

I wish I realized then to enjoy it more. I saw the sun rise and set daily since I had the corner spot. One side of my bedroom had sliders facing the beach, the other sliders facing the river.

When he arrived I took him to the famed Ocean Deck, I had a blackened mahi sandwich with him, Kristin and another friend, I dragged both of them along because it wasn't really a date.

Back at the condo that night, we stayed up until almost 1:00am talking. I was exhausted at the paper the next day.

I had a real date with that same guy Tuesday night. We left our 20 month-old under the care of her awesome Aunt Kenzie and met at a different kind of high rise on the North-side of Atlanta. Who knew that Sunday would lead to dinner and a musical, nearly 600 miles away and three years later, but I'm so glad it did.

He even sent me flowers at work for the occasion. We haven't been out as just a couple since we've moved here. It was nice to be two instead of three.

Some days, I wish we were the same two that were in the Ocean Deck on that Sunday, you see, a lot has changed. It was spelled-out so clear as I sipped sauvignon blanc, and was uncomfortable at downtown wine bar for the first-time in my life. I had to keep asking myself....are we relaxed yet? I'm not sure if I ever got there, even into the second half of Mamma Mia at the Fox Theatre.

We've grown, and have loved each other, and a whole new person and I'm so happy we have that perfect beach evening to thank.

Facelift

2010-02-08T21:12:00.006-05:00

I'm not sure if you've noticed but some things have changed around here. The pukey-green color has transcended and in its place...black, white and blue beauty.....all thanks to Erin at Designer Blogs.

I am immensely joyed about how my design turned out, Erin has a gift for designing and making you feel like you actually helped to get the outcome. I picked the artwork and backgrounds (don't we look cute), she did all the heavy lifting. It was easy and so much fun. And now I have a real blog!

This all started about a year ago when my friend Karen had her blog designed. I loved hers and wanted something like it....btw I stole the thought bubble idea from you Karen ;) But as life goes, things came up all year, you know like MOVING and bills. I felt like it would be selfish to spend money on my hobby, especially since only a handful of special people actually look at my blog.

So in December, Josh said I should go ahead a get someone to do it as a Christmas present to myself. Ironically, the same week, I saw posts on Aiming Low and Buried with Children about the auction for Blog~Bid~Hope. I knew I would have my chance and a really good reason to spend the money on my hobby. The proceeds from the auction were donated to The Liz Logelin Foundation and Anissa Mayhew!

It's funny how since then, blogging has become my full-time job and this personal blog is one of 26 outlets that I write on..... so of course I needed it to be my favorite. And now it is!

Thanks again Erin at Designer Blogs, your donation to the auction was so awesome! And to all my friends, if you want a blog as kick-butt (Josh told me to change this from bad-ass) as mine please check out their website here. Please order and mention my name because I get referral points for more cool blog stuff. And I'm now addicted to looking at blog designs and comparing and I want extra stuff one day. Referral points would be so awesome. Now I see how people can become addicted to tattoos. I just like marking on my blog, not my body.

Finally, if you want a simple way to add some spice to your blog, copy my button to the right (I actually have one!!) and add it to your site!

Playtime

2010-02-06T21:35:00.003-05:00

The most awesome time was had in my home this rainy, freezing Saturday afternoon in Atlanta. I don't think I've had that much fun or felt that relaxed in a while. It was spent cleaning the downstairs half of our home....It's OK, lyao. I know it sounds weird to me too.

Something extraordinary made it superb. My iTunes playlist. Since we've moved from Orlando about three years ago I haven't listened to my playlist or iPod for that matter.

If you know me well, you'll know that technical things like iPods, BofA Bill Pay, digital video cameras and spreadsheets are all things I don't ever want to waste my time on. I'm a technically lazy person. It's a fault I'm trying to overcome and in efforts of this, I actually spent 40 minutes of my weekend last Sunday typing in acct numbers to the BofA website. Oh Lord, what was I thinking going this long without Bill Pay. I could kick myself....hard.

So anyway, we hadn't hooked up my desktop from our previous moves until a few weeks ago when Julie wanted to watch Elmo and Daddy wanted to watch football. It was all resolved by Josh setting up the computer in the kitchen nook counter/desk thing in the house we're living in. Amazing. I have this awesome computer, with speakers and imagine the possibilities if someone just hooked it up to our wireless network. It may actually peruse the internet one day... ok, I know, baby steps.

So on this weather-crummed (did I mention it has rained in Atl 4 weekends in a row) Saturday, I was sweeping, dusting, cleaning upholstery, while listening to my favorite songs all in one sitting.
I danced and sang, it was a blast. Josh and Julie were upstairs in her playroom giving me a couple of hours to clean. I think it was the first-time I have cleaned my home while blasting music since Julie was born.

Growing-up, I learned that cleaning and music went hand-in-hand. My mom, who's a crazy, woman version of the Mr. Clean character, always blared Pink Floyd or Yes, while my sister and I crawled in between the dining room chairs she had lined up while waxing the floor. Ahhh memories. I swore though, that I would never torture Julianna with such cleaning rituals. When I think back, my mom spent the majority of her time in our home cleaning while we were growing-up, hardly ever playing with us. I don't blame her, because things were different then, but I also know that eating-off the floors isn't exactly a necessity.

The first-song on my list was Alison Krauss', Oh Atlanta. Keep in mind the list is in alphabetical order by artist, not necessarily favorite songs of Anne's. About four years ago I used to drink, a lot, and then screech this song at the top of my lungs, with my good friend Heather. At that time I would have never guessed I'd actually live in Atlanta, oh the irony. Maybe I helped plan my future with my song selections. I also have Barenaked Ladies, If I had a Million Dollars, on my list....still waiting for THAT to happen.

I loved my music and singing and cleaning. I think I will do it again soon. That alone time was much needed, productive and it made me happy. The cutest part was when Josh and Julie finally made it down the stairs to check on me. Julie and I danced to Billy Joel's Only the Good Die Young. I swung her around and she laughed hysterically. I think I just created a new ritual of my own.

Week's end

2010-01-31T20:28:00.003-05:00

The week hasn't really gotten much better. Well, Josh did come home from his work trip, which was great. He bought me this awesome popcorn from Garrett's in Chicago. This stuff was on Oprah's favorite things a few years ago and it's phenomenal. It's called Chicago blend, basically, cheese and carmel mixed. Ahh sweet and salty, I just finished the last bite.

OK well anyway, I have some complaints. These will probably seem like they should be found on this crazy website that my friend showed me at work. You can go to it here, however, keep in mind I think it's totally wrong, but funny. This is my blog and I'll whine if I want to.

1. I've been really bored lately. I am working in an office full-time, something I said I would, never do. Life is just mundane. I need to spice it up. I'm at a loss of how to do it, especially with a 20 month old.

2. I am tired of my tenants not paying rent on time. Now, one of them is moving out and breaking their lease with a two week notice after they still owe half of January. Lots of headaches, and I hate it. Will the FL real estate market PLEASE turn around already?! I'm dying to get rid of these properties.

3. I am working out and not really losing a lot of weight. OK, I KNOW the popcorn doesn't help.

4. I've had the same haircut for almost 15 years now. I'm too scared to change my natural curls and I really don't think I should dye my hair until I have to...ie: when it starts turning gray.

I went to a movie with my bff in the Atl last night. This was after I called her crying about how stressed I was about the family moving out and that this was a sign for me to move home to Daytona to our home that I love. Josh wasn't going for it, he loves it here.

BTW I need to get this off my chest. How can someone afford a boob job and a tummy tuck, when they can't even pay their rent? And they have 4 kids. People drive me crazy. Priorities anyone?

So anyway, we went to movies and snuck in Starbucks.

Kenzie and I met in journalism college at UF. She is single, living in the city, dating and can do anything she wants, when she wants. When we met at age 20, we were on the exact same path in life and 7 years later, are completely different but still love each other the same.

So in the car, here I am complaining about how my mundane life is so boring, there is nothing to do in Atlanta, the evenings after work all mirror the next, except for Monday's when HIMYM is on. Her response, well at least you're not lonely.

And she made me realize that everyone has complaints. We're all unhappy at times. We just need to over come them and feel grateful. And even though I complain, of course I'm grateful for everything I have, my job, my houses, Josh, Julie and all the headaches that come along with everything.

When things don't go my way and I'm disappointed, I just really need to keep in mind how fortunate I am. Life could always be way worse. And when I think of it like that, my troubles really have no merit. Plus, I can have dreams and write them down. One day, I will be a florist at Anne's Floral Designs. Josh and I will be able to whisk away to Las Vegas at the drop of a dime. And then I'll complain that my roses don't smell so great.

There's no place like home (except work)

2010-01-25T22:55:00.007-05:00

About twice a year, sometimes three to four, I get what any mom needs and wants...alone time. Josh is in Chicago for three days. What's a girl to do? I cried almost all morning.

Wouldn't it be super romantic if I confessed how I can't stand one more second away from him, so much so, that it brought oozing, wet tears when I was driving to work? It would be...but then I'd be a liar.

Here's the scoop. Yes, I cried all morning but it was because of events that happened because Josh was out of town...not really because he's outta town. Get it?

As a full-time working mom, I have to be in the office at 8:00am everyday. Josh always takes Julie to daycare. I hate to admit this, but on most days, I don't even get a chance to see JBop until after work, when I get the amazing role of being hero mom when I pick her up from daycare.

So since, he is out of town, a wrench was thrown in our schedule this morning and Julie was rushed from our home when she should have been sleeping and hence, the devastation occurred.

Now before I had a lovely talk with the owner of Julie's daycare this evening, I planned to YELP from a mountain top the horrible thing that happened when I dropped Julie off this morning. Was it really that bad?...well kinda. Did I over-exaggerate?....yes. Do I need or want to talk about it?...not anymore.

Here's the bottom line. I choose to work, so I don't get to parent my child 24 hours a day.

It took me all day to psycho analyze the situation for myself. You see, I've decided it kinda bothers me.

And that's what had me in tears all morning.

Now I will make a disclaimer that the last two weeks in our home have been a cracked-out version of the Wizard of OZ in which we all played multiple characters. I have been the Wicked Witch of the ATL, while Josh has played an array of the Scarecrow, man without brains (when he bought the wrong size diapers) and Tin man, without a heart (when he didn't offer to buy us the best Super Bowl seats in the world).
This whole mess is because 4 times a year, Aunt Em's sister Flo, decides to visit our home and all hell breaks lose because she's totally unexpected (that's why we have Julie). Then I become the affectionate-seeking Toto for a week, who apologizes for everything that damn witch said. Ahhh the woes of hormone disorders. And Josh I really do miss you, BTW.

Well anyway, so I was crying because I'm selfish and I choose to work, when I really can stay home if I wanted to. It would be tight, but we could definitely make it work financially. And Julie has to suffer because of this. Or does she?

I spent a lot of time tonight reading and analyzing this article from the Washington Post. It's about a working mom who like me, feels like she never has time for anything. That she doesn't do anything quite great and feels guilty if she doesn't spend enough time with her children. At least we're all not the only ones, right?

It also, highlights three sociologists opinions about moms and time. When do we find leisure time? What is that?

My sister Gina has had the luxury to know both sides. She's been a SAHM, has worked full-time and also is about to quit her job again to stay home (and move to Hawaii, but that's a whole other story). So, after reading the words of Brigid Schulte, I asked her on Facebook tonight... Is it easier being a working mom or stay-at-home-mom? Her answer...Both. Now that's a real expert opinion if you ask me.

The article's a great read if you have time. It's way too long, I don't know how a real mom actually wrote it. But it made me feel better and I'm not crying anymore. Nor am I pulling Julie from daycare, the place she loves and spends more time awake than at home. Because I really do love working, and although it's hard, I couldn't imagine not doing it. It's the best way I can parent my daughter and that's how I make it my real 24 hour job.

Are you ready for some football....stories?

2010-01-18T21:51:00.007-05:00

So you probably knew this was coming sooner or later.... ahem *clears throat* J-E-T-S JETS JETS JETS. WHOO-HOO!!

OK, now that I've gotten that off my chest, let's talk football and me.

I have been a football fan all of my life. This is the fortunate consequence of being raised alone by my father from age 8.....and just to be clear in our household growing-up, Jets was a synonym for the word football.

In Kissimmee, I spent almost every fall and winter afternoon captive in a sports bar with my dad and his best buds watching football. We'd roll up to Lucy Blues or Calico Jacks at around 12:45pm and wouldn't leave until the end of the 4:00pm games.

Now for a little girl, most of the time this was NO FUN. My dad fed my sister and I as many quarters as possible to keep us entertained, happy and complaint-free. We ate good food, played games and hung-out with hot waitresses.

My dad who was the best father in the world, deserved this after working a crummy job in the heat from 6:30am-4:00 every day. Then coming home to cook, clean, help with homework and do laundry for us. And since those were the days that satellites were for rich folks, we had to go out to see the Jets because in FL they were never on TV.

After a year or two of this ritual, I had enough stuffed bunnies and bears from the quarter machines to last a lifetime, so I was forced to suck it up and just watch and enjoy. By the time I was old enough to stay home by myself, there was NO WAY I'd ever miss a Jets game.

There was also the very fortunate Sunday once a year that we actually got to go see a Jets game in-person. It was always when they played against the Dolphins in Miami. I'd throw on my latest Jets gear and have the time of my life with my dad and grandpa.

Throw in some high school water girl days and attending college at UF, where the greatest SEC team plays... and that's the basic background to my present situation as a mom blogger/avid football fan.

Next week we (as in the Jets, cause I'm part of the team don't you know) are heading to Indianapolis for the AFC championship game. Now in my 20 plus years as a Jets fan, this has only happened ONE other time, in 1998 against the Denver Broncos...and you guessed it, we lost. That's the story of a Jets fan.

So this is a BIG DEAL and here is where it gets even bigger. If/when we win, I will need to convince Josh to spend $5,000 on tickets to go see them play in the SUPER BOWL in Miami. And no matter what anyone says, and how absurd this may be, I have made up my mind that I'm going. I even know that I'll be there wearing my old Chrebet throwback at Land Shark stadium, which I'll still sincerely call Joe Robbie.

Afterall, I know my Dad would have gone. He would have taken me and probably my sister too, and it would have been the time of his life. So because he's not here, I have to go, I could never disappoint him.

And also, when else are the Jets going to make it to the Super Bowl? I can't wait another 41 years. I just hope they don't let me down this Sunday.

What you haven't seen on Facebook

2010-01-16T14:47:00.011-05:00

I have been horrible about adding photos to my posts lately. Here's some of my favorites from the last month.

Aunt Kenzie and Julie. Pretty in pearls.

She's growing so big!

She has been impossible to pose these days. Oh I miss the days of putting her someplace and knowing she was guaranteed to be there when I got back.

This was beautiful.

The day after the snow

The snowy night in Atlanta

Drinking by MYSELF on New Year's Eve!

This is what happens when Josh is lame-o and goes to sleep at 11:00pm on New Year's Eve.

I love this lady! My mama.

Having a great time at Stone Mountain with Josh, my mom and Julie were that too. Josh

Way too much excitement to pose for a picture with that old lady.

This was the sight in our house after Santa spent 4 hours putting together a kitchen and table and chairs for Julie Christmas morning. This is one of my favs because the whole morning seemed perfect. Christmas was awesome this year.

Thoughts and Prayers for Haiti

2010-01-13T21:44:00.005-05:00

I was all set to write tonight about how my evenings with Julianna this week have been going so smooth since preparing meals and not worrying about cooking as soon as we walk in the door from work/daycare.

However, my thoughts have been halted. I just read an article on Yahoo.com about the Haitian earthquake. Today at work I read some of the stories about the devastation, but I was so busy that I couldn't really investigate the depth. We also never watch the news and get all of our news online so a busy day leaves me sort of ignorant about what's going on. This article on Yahoo really gave me the full picture of the extent of damage in Port Au Prince and surrounding areas. Not only the damage, but also the consequences of the aftermath. People who SURVIVED the treachery of the actual disaster will die from the poverty. Diseases such as measles and respiratory illness will plague survivors. Bacteria from all the dead bodies and wounds will spread infections. People will dehydrate. They have no water, shelter or many essentials. Hospitals crumbled and medical care is in desperate need.

Like many Americans, I will pray tonight and most of all be grateful for everything I have. Tragedy like this inevitably makes you feel fortunate and launches sympathy and compassion. After this post, I will research the best way to help monetarily.

Join me in praying for the thousands of people trapped, the thousands who are injured and the families of the people who didn't survive. Mothers have lost their children and children have lost their mothers. I pray for all the parents who are desperately trying to protect their children. May they have strength and get the help to survive.

Snow Day

2010-01-10T15:29:00.008-05:00

In case anyone hasn't been watching the news this week. Guess what? It's unfathomably cold. It snowed here in Atlanta and also in FL, so I hear. Although I have 25 years experience to say that's impossible.

I saw snow for the first-time in my life (that I can remember) on Thursday. It started to come down mid-day while I was at work. I made my good friend Kaitlin go outside with me as it slowly saturated the ground, my coat, my hair. It was beautiful and magical. Something everyone should see at least once in their lifetime. I didn't even feel the bitter cold for those 30 seconds in the parking lot.

Lucky for me it stopped right before I drove home from work.

The next morning, to my total shock and surprise, we learned through the news that schools were closed, which meant Julianna's daycare was also closed all day. My and Julie's first official snow day!

One of the unfortunate complications of being new to an area without any family is that when things like this happen, I have no choice but to call into work because we don't know anyone else who can watch Julie. Well, except my awesome friend Karen who's offered to help out several times. But she lives about 30 minutes away and with the roads of Atlanta being called a "death trap" on Friday, I decided that would be impossible.

Josh took his chances and made it to work (thankfully) and Julie and I marveled at a day alone to ourselves.

We played all morning. We read books, watched Elmo, played tea party. Then it was nap-time. I tried to clean and do some laundry while she slept, but I too used my day-off for a little shut-eye.

Now is where the fun part begins! After naptime, Julie's mom, moi, thought of a fantastic way to spend the rest of our day. I said to Julie "Let's go to the movies." At 19 months old she had no idea what I was talking about, but the words "bye, bye" intrigued her enough to hustle to get dressed so we wouldn't miss the previews.

I would like to clarify some things. In mid-December, Josh and I were in FL and bought the new Chipmunks Squeakquel cd for Julie for our drive home to Atlanta. Anyone who has ever been in our vehicle knows that the original Chipmunks cd is a must-have for Julie in the car. For this long drive we just couldn't stomach it again for another 7 hours. While on our drive, I updated my FB status to say how awesome the Chippettes version of "Single Ladies" was and how this would probably be Julie's first movie.

When the movie came out a few weeks ago, I said to Josh "let's go now!" and I was shot-down with "I don't think she's old enough to get it."

So for our snow day I thought this would be the perfect opportunity to 1.) create a wonderful mommy/Julie only memory and 2.) prove Josh wrong. I didn't even call him to let him know we were going.

I was able to navigate through the treacherous roads, probably not the safest thing I've ever done, but I figured the cops would be out if the roads weren't that safe.

We bought popcorn, soda, and I packed M&Ms from Julie's stocking and into the movie we went.

Everything was perfect. Julie loved the previews, she sat in my lap so intently, feeding me popcorn, then herself. I even let her have some soda for the first-time ever. When the movie started her eyes lit-up. Then when she heard Alvin's voice she giggled so sweetly. She rocked in awe every time a song came on that she knew. It was great, something I'll never forget.

About 35 minutes in, she started to get a little disinterested. She wanted to sit in her own seat, which would flip up and crush her 24lb body if I didn't lay my leg across it. Then she wanted to stand and play and talk. All which was fine, because still every time a song came on (and there were a lot) she would pause, and look up at the screen in amazement.

After that things got a little shaky. She was now talking full blast and was starting to dart past the tiny yellow lights that she was scared to step over until that point. So at about an hour and 15 minutes after sitting there and mentoring her on how to behave properly in a movie, it was time for the secret trick I had rolled-up my sleeves, a bottle!

Now she never, ever gets a bottle in public anymore. In fact, the only bottle she gets is at night-time during the week and nap-time on the weekends. I am a firm believer, that this is OK, so please don't waste your breath telling me she's too old.

I pulled it out, and all of a sudden, amazement again. She laid back in her seat with that baba and for a brief moment I was able to think...Success!, we'll make it to the end. That was until CLUNK, SPLASH, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll.....WWHHHHAAAAAAA!

It rolled down under a bajillion aisles, never to be found again. At that point I knew we'd never stay to see if the Chipmunks or Chippettes won the singing competition.

She said "baba" with a confused draw all the way out the door and for about two more miles down the road.

Josh you were right...again.

Resolution

2010-01-07T20:54:00.004-05:00

It's exactly one week into 2010. My resolution as always is to lose weight and be healthy. I can't say for sure that I'll stick to it but this time I'm really motivated. In case you haven't noticed...I kinda really need to be!

Two days after my last post, Josh and I took our Saturday off to go gym shopping. Being in a new city, we didn't really know all that Alpharetta had to offer. In Daytona I know every gym and have probably been a member of at least half.

So we checked out the Y, the discount gym that sent us a post card advertising $5 a month (totally scam by the way...it was $12) Sure both we're good enough. Cardio, weights, kiddie area for Julie just in case I ever decide to torture her with even more daycare than the 9.5 hours a day she already gets.

Then our last stop was what I've been calling the Mack Daddy all week. This gym was amazing. In fact, you can't even call it a gym, it just doesn't do it justice. For everyone who went to UF, it puts Gainesville Health and Fitness to shame.

We took the tour with a guy named, Jeff, our healthy-living sales guy. A small step up from a used car salesman. But unlike an old green 1996 Tercel, this guy had an amazing product.

Two floors of top-notch equipment, the best weight room I've ever seen, in-door basketball courts for Josh, squash ball, a spa with salon, an eatery (of course I was interested in that), upgraded locker rooms with hairdryers and the best kids play zone for Julie. They actually had rows of Macs for games and their indoor play area makes Chic-Fil-A seem like childs play.

Have I sold you yet? Well I didn't even get to mention the 2 huge pools with slides, sauna, and indoor and outdoor hot tubs. The indoor pool heats to 80 degrees in the winter and since it was 27 here on Saturday, I thought I was back in FL heaven. Plus there were tons of moms and kids playing in the pool.

At the end of this tour Jeff brought us into his sales room. It literally looked just like a car dealership, it even had the fake window that looks out to the hall for some odd reason.

Then he told us the price. $110 a month, plus $6 for Julie. Now that seemed ridiculous and I knew Josh would NEVER, EVER let us join. He sat so quietly while, I made up every excuse I could as to why we had to "think about it." Jeff was good at his job. He had obviously practiced overcoming objections in sales training. After a few minutes, I looked over at Josh who had been so annoyingly quiet the whole time. I need some back-up guy...Now! Then he looked up from his Blackberry, finally and said, "Anne, I know you want to join, we can." YES!!!

So now we're the newest members to Lifetime Fitness in Alpharetta. It's our country club and I love going. I have actually dragged my ass out of bed at 5:15am three days so far this week.With plans to also go Saturday morning before Word Camp and Sunday for an intro to Pilates class.

I forgot to mention the best part. They gave me free coffee this morning as I was leaving. And it was dark roast MY FAV. If I can manage to finagle 80 cups this month we'll actually be ahead.

Christmas Wrap....Up

2009-12-31T21:14:00.002-05:00

Sorry for the 11 day hiatus. We were busy truly enjoying the holidays. My mom came, we had wonderful food, gifts, love, visits from friends and nice relaxing days off. Overall this Christmas rocked.

I have never in my life had a better time with my mom. Her visit was so fun and full of laughs. We went to Stone Mountain and went out to lunch and shopping alone last Sunday.

We also got a pleasant surprise visit from Missy and Christian on Christmas Eve. It made my day. I'll post some pics soon.

Christmas also turned me into the biggest procrastinator this year. I still have Christmas cards to send. I guess it's never too late to get a picture of my darling Julianna.

Now it's New Year's Eve and the holidays are sadly almost over. Josh and I are on the couch, stuffed from a unique dinner of steak, chicken, pork, antelope, salads, rice and kangaroo. Oddly enough the Kangaroo wasn't the worst thing on the list. We had a great dinner at Fire of Brazil with our Atlanta friends Kaitlin and Tim.

I was elated to get out for a New Year's mini bash, but it's also so nice to be in our home, with my two favorite people, ringing in the New Year.

Julie is the inevitable party-pooper. She's already tucked away in her crib for safe keeping until morning.

This year has been phenomenal for us. Tons of love, success, growth. Although the year started a little shaky as we were feeling the recession pits like many people in 2009. We have been blessed with everything we could ask for. I also escaped the year without attending a funeral.

And although it's been mostly peaches and cream for us, I know many people that are waving a huge "up yours" tonight to good ol'2009. I understand, empathize and have prayed for all of you this year. My truest and best wishes for a 180 in 2010.

I also pray that 2010 will continue to bring us many blessings. 2007 was so tremendously horrible with my dad's death. 2008 brought us Julie and a new house. 2009 a new city with new jobs. Could it get better?

I am reminded of my favorite quote from my father "In life, don't get too high, don't get too low."

Happy New Year to all. I hope you're ringing it in with your loves.

Sick again

2009-12-20T22:52:00.003-05:00

Fact. Julianna will get sick an average of 12 times in a year as a toddler in daycare. The average cold will last two weeks and most of these sicknesses will be during the winter months. Has anyone else done the math? It basically equals... sucks to be us right now.

These stats were given to us by Julianna's new pediatrician, who may have to become my new best friend in Atlanta after all these visits. I feel like I see her more than my real best friend sometimes.

The latest episode is a tummy virus which had us fleeing the Perimeter Mall on the busiest Saturday of the year. I'll spare you the gross details but after 19 months of momhood, I made a rookie mistake of forgetting a change of clothes. Julie thought it was hilarious that she was wrapped in mommy's jacket while bouncing through Nordstrom to the parking lot.

In Florida we had a private sitter for Julianna. Colds were hardly ever a huge issue. Of course she's been sick before, but until our move, she has never experienced an ear infection or constant nasal drip for like, oh, a whole season.

I was fortunate as a working mom to have someone we trusted and loved in Florida to care for Julie her first 15 months of life. I also worked from home, which made everything much easier. These days, it's hard to even find time to schedule check-ups, so these viral hiccups really throw our schedules through a loop.

I know I must not to the first working mom who has had this complaint. Will she grow out of this? Or are we doomed for every winter season.

Tale of Pops and Boxes

2009-12-17T20:43:00.008-05:00

It's 10:35 a.m., far too early for your second meal of the day, but this fifth-grader always skipped breakfast for such reasons. It's 1992 at Ventura Elementary in Kissimmee, FL. I'm proudly donning a huge purple, satin scrunchy with acid washed jeans and a flowery top that my dad bought at K-Mart.

I walk into the huge cafeteria lined-up with my peers. My best friend Kelly Roy is behind me with her brown paper sack. I am toting one of my most favorite items to date, my Beverly Hills 90210 pink, classic-style lunch box. It has all seven characters and my favorite guy, Luke Perry, is in swim trucks.

The cafeteria lingers with scents of stale food and sometimes a whiff of fresh baked rolls. Today is Wednesday, not Friday-pizza day, so I've brought my own lunch and will pass on the school entree of chicken patties with green beans and instant-mashed.

Us "packers" sit down at our long, aligned benches, as the remainder of the class trots to the lunch line.

I eagerly unfasten my lunch box. By now, I'm starving! Roast beef on rye, with tons of mayo wrapped in messy aluminum foil. Dad made my lunch today. On the side is a Little Debbie Swiss Cake Roll, which I'll hopefully trade for some corn chips, and to drink, a Hi-C fruit box.

I waste no time scarfing and talking. I look at my box a few times and admire the pretty girls in bikinis.

Kelly and I chat about safety patrol. "Who's turn is it to bring in blow-pops?" After school, with our neon orange belts, we'll hide behind a building and play hop-scotch while sucking on the same blueberry flavored pop that we wrapped and saved from days prior.

In the lunch room there is tons of noise and laughter. It's my one of my favorite times of the day. At 10:59 we see Mrs. Clark arrive to pick us up. The bell rings and back to class we go.

Anne's Favorite Things #6

2009-12-17T00:31:00.002-05:00

Well Christmas is one week and one day away. Can you believe it?! I definitely can't. As many of you probably have noticed my list is drawing short. BLAH! Not enough time do anything these days. Traveling and Christmas have put me behind so much. It's 12:33am, way past my bedtime. But after working all day, then shopping and Christmas cards, I need some relaxation mommy time. I wish I drank more often or wasn't trying to lose 5 lbs before Christmas, otherwise I would indulge in chocolate and Baileys (my favorite Christmas drink), so instead, I blog.

And since I have no thought process at this moment....I will make Baileys Irish Creme number six on my list. If you haven't tried it with Egg Nog...run out and go buy some now. You can thank me later.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Toddler

2009-12-13T20:50:00.004-05:00

Lately I haven't written much about Julianna. What's going on with her besides black-eyes and head shakes? The answer is tooooooo much and that's probably why I've avoided her like the plague. BTW she's amazing.

My daughter will be 19 months old next week. Can you believe it? She's talking ( about 30-35 words under her belt), she's running, climbing, playful, joyous, pulling-up her own socks, in-love with gloves and books, and she can count....kinda.

She also knows her colors. Well, just blue, but I am a proud momma who makes sure to point to anything blue when asking her in front of friends and family "Julie, what color is this?" Then me: "Isn't she so smart?" But that's our little secret. She'll learn one day that Christmas trees aren't "buueeeewwww."

Not to sound all mushy, but she has made my life so happy. Josh and I are more enthralled each day. Although not everything is sugar and spice. For the first time ever, she's fighting sleep and she clearly has a favorite parent at the moment. Josh gets to raise his hand for this one.

But overall this is the coolest age. The "sponge" analogy is on target. She tries to repeat everything, which I'm sure is going to bite me in the ass any second now. She has some hair! It's a short-curly mess, but holds clips. And she can use her mind to problem solve and play imaginatively.

My little baby is a toddler now.

Going Home

2009-12-09T22:59:00.005-05:00

Tomorrow we're leaving on a trip to go home for four days. Seems like we just left yesterday, but after three months in Atlanta, our new home, the thought of home has made me realize that I oddly sometimes feel like I do not belong here. Nothing is familiar.

Oh and how I miss the Florida sunshine and ease. Things are slower there. At least in the beach towns like where we're from in New Smyrna.

Julie will never know what it's like to be raised a FL girl. Day trips to Cocoa Beach, salt water fishing in the intracoastal, grocery shopping in Winn Dixie, shuttles flying above the school yard and Disney practically in your backyard. That is my norm and I miss it.

I know tons of mothers raise their children in different cities or states from where they grew-up. Part of growing-up is experiencing new things and I feel as though everyone measures success based on how far away we reach from our nest. My own mother transplanted me to Florida from New York City when I was 2. I wonder if she ever felt like she didn't belong. Now, she'd never leave her waterside condo.

When I was 10 and growing-up Kissimmee, I swore to everyone I knew that I'd leave FL one day. I wanted more in life, nothing seemed exciting or good enough for me. I made it out and I'm happy but I also feel like sometimes the grass isn't always greener.
And tomorrow when we reach the Ormond Beach bridge. I know I'll be grinning ear to ear.

Perhaps someday Julie will some day feel the same way about Georgia.

Anne's Favorite Things #5

2009-12-08T21:38:00.003-05:00

About four years ago, I got suckered into one of those sales presentations at my home. It was from one of my client's sons when I worked at the newspaper, and I thought I'd be nice and let him give me a pitch.

When he came to mi casa, he set-up at my kitchen table and pulled out all his tricks. He was like a magician of cooking utensils and I was in awe. These knives cut through rope, pennies, you name it. All with ease and super sharp edges that were guaranteed for life. Basically, the Lexus of knives, and you know how much I love those. I was lured into buying a $1200 set. Yikes! What the hell was I thinking?...except that I had no kids, advertising was good to me at the time and my little house on Isabelle was worth a small fortune. You know, the GOOD times, before all this crazy recession stuff.

Years later I can still say I made great purchase. I don't think I could cook without these babies. I know some of you may be thinking that for $1200 dollars, these things should cook for you! I hear ya. These days I would never buy as many as I did.

And although I love all of my Cutco knives, these table knives are so cool in red and are a pretty affordable way to start your collection. Plus 10% of all sales of this set goes to the American Heart Association!

To shop for yours look here.
Just in case you forgot, read about Anne's Favorite Things here.

Ankle

2009-12-07T22:39:00.007-05:00

My Monday morning started with a quick trip to the ER. I say quick, because I was in-and-out of there in one hour flat with x-rays and all. Emory Johns Creek Hospital is fantastic. I actually made it to work by 10am.
My ankle has been bothering me for months. It's sprained, AGAIN.

Let's back track a little. In middle school I had to take PE class, which I hated since my athleticism has never prospered. I have always been the fat kid, so running, especially for a timed exercise, was a horrible experience for me. Nonetheless, the State of FL required that my PE coach time the entire class. I dreaded this annually.

So in sixth grade, off I went with my best friend Kelly Roy. At about 1/20 of a mile into it, I fell into a deep hole that fit my foot perfectly. I was on the ground, with dirt-compacted knees. Kelly no longer saw me, and actually thought I was trying to out-run her at the time. HA.

That was the beginning of a 15 year battle with pain, swelling and omg unbearable limping at times. Since my dad couldn't afford to take me to the dr or hospital, I just wrapped it in an ace bandage and borrowed crutches from Kelly for a few days.
It's never been better.

I can go months without pain but it always creeps back. Well this time, it was unbearable, and I finally had it after a twist on my stairs. Off to the ER today I went. It wasn't fractured, I figured it wouldn't be, but the doc said it was pretty bad. My range of motion is very limited and I'm in a gigantic, black, velcro-strapped boot for 6 weeks or so. This time I really do plan on following-up with an orthopedic specialist for further examination. I want to be able to walk at age 50.

The kinda funny thing is that this weekend we're traveling back home to FL to go to Kelly's wedding and after 15 years ....I have to show-up in a medical boot.

Anne's Favorite Things #4

2009-12-05T23:44:00.005-05:00

I'll get to the goods, but I have several things I need to share first
1. Our Christmas tree this year actually took 5 strands of lights. 500 bulbs on 7 ft of tree, to me, that's a lot.
2. Josh and I are so glad we didn't spend $500 on a last minute offer to see the Gator's lose in Atlanta.
3. My sister got married to a guy I've never met today. No... I'm not estranged from my sister, I would actually call us pretty close, but she's only spent 15 full days with this guy.
4. I stole a leather belt today from Kohl's. This was for Josh and yes, of course it was a total accident, however, no, I did not go back and pay for it (Julianna if you ever read this, DO NOT EVER STEAL)
5. Seeing Timmy T cry tonight has made me realize that I am now a mother (18 months into this jazz) I felt so bad for him....if it was two years ago, I would have totally called him a PY.

As you can read it's been sort of an odd day. So I'd like to share the oddest thing that's going to be on my list this year.
It's the bra I told you about here. From Le Mystere, the Dream Tisha bra is $74. For places to buy it look here. I know what you're thinking, that is insane for a bra. I thought so too, but it has changed my life! I have never had a more comfortable bra. It fits perfectly, doesn't pinch, or move and the straps go nowhere. Pretty much simply amazing. Plus, I recently found out that Oprah wears them! Now, I just need to save up to buy some more.

Really...???

2009-12-04T21:57:00.002-05:00

Food Lion, no...Pike's, no...Home Depot, no...Costco's, no...Kroger's, no...Lowe's, no...than where??? Ok, lets go back to Home Depot. This is what we did on a Friday night in the ATL. It's that time of year again, so of course, we were looking for a Christmas tree. For those of you that don't know, they make these wonderful artificial trees that look almost real, have NO mess, are easy to assemble, and within 3 years, you are saving money. Of course, Annie wants a real tree and Annie gets what she wants. She deserves to. But really? Six different places? We went back and forth on Woodward Parkway about 4 times until we ended back where we started. I think Julie grew an inch taller during the trip. On the bright side, we have a very poorly trimmed, crooked tree that we have to face what we are calling "backwards" in order to show the side that has a slope to it. (The "backside" is very flat) And yes, the parenthesis are pointing out the fact that a tree has no "back" but I digress.

Annie had mentioned the great paper towel thing that we have in the kitchen, calling it one of her favorite things. I'll leave that one alone. What I want to do is point out one of my favorite things we have, the PlayStation portable. For those of you that have not played one, stop reading and go buy one on Craigslist for $80!!! This is the greatest thing EVER made. I mean, you can take Madden on the road and surf the Internet anywhere there's wireless on a screen that you can actually read, unlike my blackberry, and watch movies in high quality visibility. The PSP is great on road trips (see Annie's trip to NC) for unwinding at night, using the bathroom, and pretty much any time your watching football and want to have something to do during commercials. If you are looking for a gift for your significant other, ladies surprise him with them gem! Even if he is not a "gamer" or a "maddener" he can find use for the PSP.

This is HIStory.

December 2nd

2009-12-03T22:44:00.007-05:00

I read a blog from a well known writer this week on MommyTracked.com. It was the first time I have ever read anything from Risa Green, author of Notes from the Underbelly, but it really grabbed my attention quickly.
Her father passed away within the last few weeks from a sudden heart attack. She writes about "an unexpected gift" of comfort and support from her internet community.
Oh boy, can I relate.
Yesterday, marked the two-year anniversary since my sister and I buried our father. I still can't believe it. I was 25, he 54.
Things I've learned in the past two years...
1. It's amazing to have faith that you will see a loved one again.
2. I'm not the only person in the world who has lost their favorite person.
3. Time does make it easier.
4. You will truly never, ever stop missing them.

There are some days when I can still imagine picking-up the phone to call my dad. Every time he'd answer I'd always say "hey Dad" and he would always say to me that he could tell what kind of day I was having based on my tone.

I miss the small things the most. The laughs, lunches, holding his hand....he would always press down on my fingertips.
I also miss what could have been. Julianna would have adored him, as he would have her. I still can't grasp that he won't walk me down the aisle.
For those who may wonder, yes, I still cry. It hurts. Josh is probably the only one who knows. Not everyday or every week anymore, but probably about once a month. And I really do think about him everyday, usually multiple times. It's OK to talk about him. I wish you would.

Lastly, I've learned through my father's death how fortunate I am. There is far worse pain in the world. I am blessed to have had an amazing father to lose and this prospective has made me humbled for my loss. I know that there are parents out there who lose their children everyday and I am so blessed have my little Julianna Philip.

Anne Favorite Things #3

2009-12-01T22:33:00.004-05:00

When I bought my first house my awesome Aunt Pam bought me the greatest paper towel holder ever. You may wonder why the heck ANYONE needs a $65.00 paper towel holder. The truth is you don't. But it's gorgeous and oh so pretty on the kitchen counter. Has your paper towel holder ever received compliments? This is one of the coolest gifts I've ever received.

Made by Arthur Court, this "Grape Tuscan" paper towel holder is available on Amazon.com

Thanksgiving

2009-11-30T20:30:00.010-05:00

We took a 5 day trip to Raleigh for Thanksgiving this year to see my grandmother and family. It was a ton of fun and so relaxing. Man, did I need it. It was so pleasant to not have to worry about work or cleaning the house, cooking or laundry. The perfect vacation. And Josh and Julie had a good time too. The best part was NO ONE got sick!!!! The bad part was poor Julie has returned with her first shiner.
I am 27 and have never had a black eye. I felt so awful. She was running away from me (playing), slid and crashed into the coffee table. Thank God, she did not need stitches. Josh of course, was more of a mess than Julianna. She was a tough cookie and barely cried after my cousin held her...of course she did NOT want her mamma.
The drive up was not horrible either. It is so nice to be further north in Atlanta for trips like these. 6 hours to Raleigh and 6 to FL....perfect.

I made these monster chocolate chip cookies for our trip. I used my mom's recipe, basically the back of the Nestle's chips bag with about a half cup more flour. Easy, but good, my kind of cookie.

Being back in Atlanta today has made me sad. I miss being around family, it's kinda lonely here in Atlanta. We still don't have a ton of friends and life with working so much is super boring sometimes. Plus, I'm not sure where Fall went but it's looong gone and all the trees here are bare or filled with rotten brown leaves.

Oh well, at least Julie's been entertaining us with her shaking of her head "no" without saying it. We're still at the point that it's so cute and awesome that she knows how to express her wants and unwants.....I'll let you know in a few weeks how cute we will is after the 1,000th "no" head shake.

Lastly, I'm stoked that I think Julie knows her numbers. I pointed to 10 and 3 today and she mumbled words that sounded just like them. Her phenom abilities are finally "shining" through.

Disappointed

2009-11-24T22:25:00.003-05:00

To sum up today in one word.... disappointing. One of the major hassles of being a working mother to a young child(ren) is, well, work. Everyone has complaints about the job they're in, we all know I've had my share, but I just want to say again to get it off my chest, today was sooooo super disappointing.

Now I will say this, on the upside, the great thing about being a working mother is the mother part. After my disappointing day, I came home to my baby and spouse and everything seemed better.

Plus to help end my day on a better note we went to the North Point Mall in Alpharetta (where we really live). Josh got a football game, we ate Japanese mall food, then Josh took Julie home to bed, while I stayed to bra shop.

Want to know how to end a disappointing day? Walk into Dillards a size 42 DD leave a size 40G. WTF. I thought I couldn't handle anything more absurd today. Oh yes, and to put icing on the cake, me in my depressed, disappointing state I bought my first $74 bra ever. It's from a company called Le Mystere, totally worth every penny. I got home and read the tag, and the bra company is a proud supporter of the American Heart Association. More reason it's totally awesome and that kinda ends my disappointing work day into a very ironic one.

HisStory

2009-11-24T21:51:00.002-05:00

She has asked and asked and asked for months now. She has asked me for this more times than she has asked for sex (which is a lot!) She begs and pleads and I still do not give in. What is this desperate call to action that is so important it can be drawn out for 12 months and still not have her cave in? Writing on her blog.

According to a very well respected website (it came up second when I googled it which means it totally has to be legit) there are over 50 million blogs right now and that number will double in about 6 1/2 months. Why on earth would I care about contributing to a blog that only a half dozen people will read, and those will only read because they are prompted to. I mean, I am a doctoral student studying leadership in higher education, I have an 18 month old daughter, I manage 26 employees for a company that has revenues in the billions, and I just purchased Madden 2010 and have a playbook to create. I mean, I have some important things to do!!!

But, Annie is most important of all. And after 365 days, I caved in. (Plus, she said if I write once a week, she will shut up about it! :-)

So here we are. The Ozzie and Harriet of the Blogosphere. We are not Jon and Kate (although Annie does like the Taco Bell drive through guy who was a teenager, so maybe she is Jon) but we do have our stories. I will not edit, proofread, or reread anything I write so its coming straight from the pressured heart! Let us (well, her) know what you think.

Anne Favorite Things #2

2009-11-23T23:31:00.003-05:00

In the spirit of the holidays I said I was going to start Anne's Favorite Things...see here. My week hiatus for my sickness has made me decide to just make it a top 15 list. I'll have it complete the week before Christmas. Josh feel free to CHIME IN anytime now......

#2 on my list Biscuit's Pet and Play Christmas. Besides being the coolest book ever, this "Funny Puppy" always makes Julie smile. And it's always great to pull it out just to hear Julie say boooooo....her fav new word for book. She'll learn those K's one day.
And it's only $6.99 at Barnes and Nobles.

Wrench

2009-11-21T21:50:00.012-05:00

Just when things have finally calmed down after our huge move to Atlanta, we had to ALL get sick. I won't go into the boring details, but this is what was on our order....2 upper respiratory infections, with possible asthmatic coughing, esophagitis with a side of double ear infection. Major *note* esophagitis, causes the worst nausea ever...so no, I was really not pregnant (just in case anyone got scared from my last post) and now yours truly is on some stomach meds that they actually give to cancer patients. Another top reason why cancer sucks...nausea, probably a lot worse than esophagitis, but I have no tolerance for pain.

We went to get our Christmas photos today at Sears. It's my fav place for pics because #1 they're cheap and #2 they're good...usually. No one warned me how horrible it is to have an 18 month-old sit in front of a camera and smile, for a STRANGER. She cried and screamed and for the first-time ever, my daughter was one of THOSE kids. Which kids? The type of kid I hated before I became a mother. The type that before, when I knew EVERYTHING there was to know about parenting, I swore I would never have. Just basically a NORMAL kid...hehe.
Oh, but we got looks and the poor Sears lady who kinda sucked at her job anyway, thought Julianna just plain sucked. And for a brief moment, for the first-time ever, I thought she sucked too. It's a good thing she's so damn cute...

At least she would take a picture with him, she wouldn't stop crying unless Josh was 2 inches away from her.

Small taste of the tude

This was an early attempt...I think this will be our card this year.

My pretty girl

This is the best one...

This is really what most of them looked like....

Take 2

2009-11-16T22:38:00.006-05:00

I don't think I ever really addressed why this blog is now take 2. A few reasons, one I stopped writing on here for quite some time, two this is the second city we've lived in since I've started this here blog and three, (2) is now the number of people of who are going to be writers on here!
Josh doesn't know it yet, but on top of working, school and daddyhood...he's going to become a part-time blogger. It's something we've talked about a while ago when we lived in Daytona. He said he would do it then, let's see how he takes this. Obviously, I don't take it all too serious and let's face it I need some help!
I think I've actually lost all of my readers and posting pics... who has time for that?

It will be nice to get his insights and ideas, especially to one day show Julie. Plus, with being new to Atlanta, GA and all this great big city has to write about, well, I need some help.

With all that said here's the funniest thing said in our house tonight...Josh: "You couldn't find a pregnancy test?...oh well"

We Made It!!

2009-11-10T22:13:00.006-05:00

Ok, well we actually made it here a while ago. Two months and 4 days to be exact, but who's counting. Perhaps just a weather man because it's probably rained 50 of those 65 days in Atlanta. Everyone keeps joking, "you must have brought the rain from FL." Yes, it rains in FL..a lot, but not this much, and not for days in cold miserable air.

Soooooo much has happened in our couple of months here. Seems like just yesterday we moved, but we've already been back to FL once! That's all thanks a certain tenant who just magically disappeared into thin air.

I'm sure you're wondering by now...WHAT do you think!? Do you guys LIKE it!? How's your NEW life?!
The answers in order....... ehhh, sometimes, pretty good.

There is no doubt in my mind that the Sunday we loaded and unloaded the car three times, to only leave the next morning was the BEST decision we could have possibly made for our family. Josh LOVES LOVES LOVES his new job and he's already started his PhD classes. Seems like after all these years, I am going to marry a dr after all.

We're more financially stable, happier, have growth opportunity...tons of it, and I'm not living in FL, something I said I would always do. Atlanta itself has its ups and downs, more of which I will dedicate the next few months of this blog about. The traffic is almost of bad as people say, although we live in the suburbs and I work in another suburb so I bare the least burdens in this family. But there is a lot more to do here, way more than Daytona Beach.

Interesting enough though I still get a small town feel, isn't that weird? Everything is spread out, but I've already mastered an overall knowledge of where things are in the city.

The last couple of months we've experienced the Atlanta Zoo, the Fernbank Museum, the Duluth Fall Festival, Atlantic Station and some park downtown near Georgia Tech.

Our goal is to do one touristy thing here a month...although I will say I think I haven't seen a tourist yet. Coming from FL that is WEIRD.

Moving

2009-08-20T23:05:00.002-04:00

OMG...we're moving in 18 days. I am so happy about my new job up there but I was just informed today that I start on the 8th.

So much to do and so little time! Plus our house did fall through so now it's Josh's job to find the house and I won't even get to see it. THAT's CRAZY!

Home

2009-08-16T21:46:00.003-04:00

Josh came home this weekend. This week was the longest we have even been apart in two years! I missed him like crazy. I thank God for texting and cell phones, without which I may not have survived.
It was so great to his face on Friday. He looked more handsome than he EVER has before. We had a sweet and romantic weekend...even though his mom was here!

I also just found out that we may not get our amazing home to rent afterall. The listing agent has us as #2, after some other family that she thinks is better than us....Can you believe it!! I am so mad. I actually am debating on not renting it if her #1's fall through. They don't even have their application in yet. And we faxed our's over ASAP...Some people geesh.

On the same front, no one has called about our house yet. I think because it's on Craigslist only....it's time to follow my own advice, I'll be posting it on rentals.com tomorrow and probably in the NJ too.

Anyone out there want to rent an awesome 5 bedroom house in New Smyrna Beach. It's really nice.

Brown Toilet

2009-08-12T21:02:00.002-04:00

So we found a house to live in. YEAH!

We finally decided on one amazing home in Sandy Springs after seeing hundreds, literally... thanks to something called online shopping and help from the BEST real estate agent Atlanta has to offer. Call me if you want a referral, his name is Oliver Alexander.

I love the home. It's almost like our house here in New Smyrna. Just older, but it has new carpet, a wooden room with a wet bar, a great location by 400 and a huge bonus/play room for Julianna. The kitchen has been semi-renovated (it still has its original wood cabinets, which I happen to love)
The only downside is that the downstairs half-bath has a brown toilet. It's not stained brown...NOPE. The whole thing is brown porclein. I'll have to take a picture of it when I eventually get moved in. You'll never believe it because WHO in their right mind decided...."hmmm I need a toilet. I think I'll go with brown, the color of $#@&," yeah you guessed it!!
It's truly one of the oddest things I think I have ever seen.

Let's back track a little because some of you probably are like WHAT you're moving!!!! and yes I have now changed the name of this here blog to Take Two...as in the second city we're going to live in since I've started this.

So it's been a little over 30 Days since two posts ago and EVERYTHING came true, except me losing ten pounds, go figure.

Josh got an amazing job offer that we could not turn down, although I have to let everyone know I DID get the AHA job....which made me feel AMAZING, I'm good at what I do afterall. But we turned it down to let Josh have his dream job and so we could start a new adventure. I am so excited to live outside of FL for the first-time in my life (that I can actually remember)

Josh has already started and LOVES it...so awesome. And I get to play single-parent until the middle of September. That's the not so fun part, but I'll survive.

I am going to take job with my current employer, but not in sales for now, since I've been obviously been a little burnt out...and they don't have a place for me anyway.

Everything seems to be falling perfectly into place and I am happy.

HBO

2009-07-11T23:14:00.002-04:00

Although our lives are in limbo right now with our whole moving situation, I have been surprisingly so happy this week. We had a great visit from my cousin Diana and I had that big job interview on Monday. I hope I get a second call back from the AHA. It would be an amazing job for me and I would feel so accomplished and would be so in love with my career again.

In the meantime, I'm not stressing that we're going broke. We even went out to dinner and played mini golf tonight, which I know we can't afford. I just have feeling things are going to work out to our favor.

I keep hoping that we either stay here with me having a GREAT, NEW JOB! or we move to Atlanta where Josh has a great opportunity. I hate to say it but right now money will talk and that's where we'll be cause it just isn't happening right now.

In the meantime, I am so tickled with how simple it is to make Josh happy. We signed-up for HBO today again because the season premier of Entourage will be on tomorrow. We were driving home from mini golf and he said, I can't wait to go home and watch movies on HBO....and he was really happy and excited. I wish I could be more like him.

Changes

2009-06-27T22:39:00.002-04:00

Things I think will happen in the next 30 days.
1. Josh will get a job offer in a city afar and we'll comtemplate moving.
2. Kristin and Dan will move to Sarasota.
3. Julianna will begin walking....then everyone can stop telling me "no she's not behind, (blank name) didn't walk until (blank month after 12 months)"
4. I will get laid-off from my job. Yikes!
5. My mom will also be moving...this one's a for sure thing. She found a bad ass apt on the river for only $600 a month.
6. I will lose 10 lbs...keep in mind these are things I think, no pressure!

I am so unbelieveably stressed by all this work garbage still. Please keep praying for me.

Take Two?

2009-06-24T23:15:00.002-04:00

The last three weeks have been a complete scramble. Throw in a few good days of catch-up on the weekends, a wonderful Father's Day and Josh's Birthday without which I may not have survived.
I know this is a constant complaint I have, BUT REALLY, when will I ever have a enough time? I have had to be 110% devoted to work because my boss came down a few weeks ago and hinted a lay-off, perhaps my book may close? WHAT!! And who knows. I have worked harder than any sales rep and my results have been better but not all that impressive. This recession is unbelievable and deep, really deep.
I'm only writing on here now because Josh went out to see Transformers and I am neglecting to do a spreadsheet that I really need to complete. Plus, there is a pile of dishes in the sink, the laundry is stacked high, and my floors haven't been swept in weeks. But I needed some mommy time and I really don't want to have to change the name of this blog.
There are some positives on the horizon. Perhaps a big move for me and Josh and an opportunity for me to stay home with Julianna? And this most AMAZING job opportunity that I really want and that I know is meant for me. Please pray that I get a call back. The circumstances to me have almost seemed like this is fate and meant to be, because 1. I saw this company hiring in the city Josh is interviewing in 2. The very next day this company had an opening here in Daytona, where we wouldn't have to move and leave to be happy. 3. It would be a job that I could give back and help others, something I feel like is missing from my life.

I am hoping and praying that I have the opportunity to interview for this job. I am so passionate about this and I know it'll change my life for the better and make me happy again.

Bathingsuit

2009-06-13T12:40:00.004-04:00

I absolutley love myself sometimes. In one of my drawers, that I never go in, I found a brand-new bathing suit!!. The best part is that it fits and now I remember that I got it like half-off at KMart last year at the end of the season.
I have been wanting to go to the beach all year and we just have't gone...and we live only 10 minutes away from New Smyrna Beach. I know, pathetic.
Besides the fact that Josh really hates the beach, there has been one thing really holding me back from going.
My weight and swimsuit issue. I'm being totally honest here when I say, I've really let myself go this year.
I am the only person I know who has gained weight...AFTER having the baby. No more excuses. I am going to start excersing everyday, even if it means waking-up at 6:00am before Julie and walking, just so I have time to dedicate to myself and my health. Since we stopped eating out, I eat healthier, but the snacking and stress eating has got to stop. And that's because I always make excuses about my time issues.
Yes, I know I'm busy, but everyone is....no more excuses.
It's really sad that my one-year old has been to the beach only once this year because her fat mommy doesn't want the agony of trying on her bathing suits that used to fit her. I have been actually scared of them!!
And the thought of actually going out to shop for one has been tortuous, hence my gratitude with my conscious consumer planning that I did last year when I bought this suit.
I did an excellent job maintaining a healthy weight in college, then afterward it's totally crept-up on me and then after this year with having Julie...YIKES!
So today we're going to the beach (it's a gorgeous day) and I'm going to be in this fat swimsuit, that today I'm really grateful to have,
BUT by the end of August towards the end beach season, I'll be back in my old ones that are now at the bottom of my drawer.

Blur

2009-06-11T23:57:00.002-04:00

This week has been sooooooo crummy. I'm really trying hard to be positive here but I can't.
I'm exhausted beyond belief, I'm working my ass-off, my poor kid has no clean pjs and my daisies did all die (see below...I'm too tired to link)

Garden

2009-06-07T22:17:00.011-04:00

I haven't felt this good on a Sunday night in a long time. I am not dreading the week because I feel sort of caught-up. The best part is I'm well rested after the awesome nap I took this afternoon while Julie was sleeping. Plus, I'm not in production on my magazine, so I'm really looking forward to working and not being stressed.

Most of the weekend was spent cleaning my house and hanging at home. I think we needed a weekend like this to actually get some things done.

This week is going to be much better than last week...I'm going to make it great!

Since I didn't get a chance to garden (because it rained all weekend) I took some pictures of my flowers.

Daisies...these things are dying off slowly one by one

Strawflowers, these open and close every day and night

African Daisies

Geraniums

Hydrangea (My favorite flower) Josh bought me this one for Valentines Day in 2008

Lantana

Zinnia, this bloom is amazing because a month ago this thing was almost dead.

Hours

2009-06-05T23:53:00.003-04:00

I need about three more hours added to everyday and about the energy level of a five-year old to go with it.
I again am so behind in everything. I am all consumed with work, trying my hardest to be good at it and make some money. Plus build relationships so that when this recession ends, people with think of me and advertise.
Everything else has just gone to the wayside (Is that the saying) including this blog.
My to-do list is too long to write. I'm going to try to get some things done this weekend before I even attempt to write a list. I am feeling overwhelmed and the house shows it.
On the plus side, I really feel like because I haven't been so nutso about the house that I've spent major quality time with Julie this week, in-between work and constantly thinking and stressing.

She's so darn close to walking, she just needs to get up the nerve to get up and go. And Josh despite what I may say at times, I think our daughter is so smart...that's why she does everything on her terms.

The most amazing thing since she's been born happened this week. It was 7:00am, Josh took her out of her crib, put her on the floor in our room to play and watch some Blues Clues. He jumped back into bed (where I was still half-asleep). She played for a sec, then pulled herself up the side of the bed and said clear as day....Momma...Dadda. She was totally calling for us. AMAZING!! So cool. That's the first-time she said both of our names together... and to get something she wanted.
Just wait for the day when she just runs in and jumps on our bed.

Pics

2009-05-26T22:28:00.010-04:00

I've been meaning to post these 1st Birthday pics for a week...I'm so behind on everything :)

Towel

2009-05-22T17:26:00.005-04:00

It's just been one of those weeks. I feel like throwing in the towel...on everything. Let's sell the houses, the cars, all of it. Let's live quaintly. In a small apartment, that's easy to clean. I'll quit my job. Have no stress. Get to be with my baby all day. Take walks on the beach, cook for Josh every night and write on this blog more often. Sometimes this working mom stuff is for the dogs.
I think I'm in a pissy mood because it has rained here ALL week. Not just once a day all week, but constant, without stopping, flooding rain. There are people that have rain water rising into their homes and their cars, ruining every little bit they have. I have gotten calls from some friends asking if we're ok. Thanks... we're great, just depressed. It seems like the really bad parts are all in the low income neighborhoods. WHY? That makes me mad. I am grateful it's not us, don't get me wrong, but I feel so sorry for people who have no insurance and no back-ups. They've been forced from their homes and don't know what mess they'll come home to.
I need to focus on the positive but I am just feeling beat-up at work.

It's hard selling anything right now and my whole source of being at my job is to sell, advertising that is....and people just aren't buying. They're actually doing the opposite like cancelling. I was next to a realtor during a luncheon this week. The speaker said something like being in real estate is like a rollercoast of highs and lows. He needed to correct himself to say that's any sales job. My job is bipolar....any help please!

I need to focus on the positives. I wanted this post to be all about what a fun, fantastic day Julianna's birthday party was and how I feel so accomplished for making her happy and healthy all year. And how my mom stayed for two days, which thank God she did because Josh's mom too stayed for days....and I couldn't have survived without my mom here. Also, she got so many great and thoughtful presents. We have wonderful friends and family. She had the cutest cake eating face too...and laughed all weekend. And now it's Friday again...and I get three whole days with my baby.

I'm feeling much better already.

Sleepover

2009-05-14T23:27:00.002-04:00

Josh is treating me to a night alone with my friend Heather tomorrow night and I can't wait. Heather's husband is out of town for 5 days, doing his chiropractic boards in Utah, so we're having a good old-fashioned girl's sleep over at her house. I sound like a big dork, I know, but no waking-up to give a bottle or change a diaper. I can't wait! I can't say that enough.

I actually lived with Heather and Heath (cute names, I know) when I moved to Daytona, and a month later Joe and I broke-up. I had no where else to go. We hadn't even known eachother for that long when they took me in. Best friend's like that don't come around often. I'm sad that this year of me being a new mommy and moving to a diffrent neighborhood has changed things a bit. But as a good friend, she's been nothing but happy for me and supportive. Plus Julie LOVES her Aunt Heather.

It's hard to balance a family and friends sometimes, it's kinda like the "old me" gets to be back for a night....although Josh, I love the new me and our life more than anything.

Why?

2009-05-12T21:52:00.000-04:00

Why did Julie poop all over herself and the car seat? Why did she grab it in between her fingers and smush all over her face? Why did she decide to do this while on the way to Sears to get her 1 year-old pictures?
I know, soooo gross. At least you weren't the one who had to clean it up. I've heard of gross stories like this from other mommys, but I NEVER thought it would happen to me. She even put her hand in her mouth. The worst part is that I ran out of wipes. It's a great thing that I work in sales and have tons on paper flyers in my car.
Sorry Julie, my poor gastrointestinal challenge. I think the Miralax was too much last night with the Gogurt.
I am nominating myself for mom-of-the-year for strategically cleaning-up the mess and still getting to her the portrait studio with no traces of the disaster. The beautiful pics say it all. AND I didn't curse Josh out for my bad luck, though this would never have happened to him. I also win the free-parking for poopy diaper changing for the rest of the year. I guess worse things have happened.

Today I am praying,
For a close friend of Josh's who was diagnosed with MS
For my career to lead to success this year
For the lonely and despaired
For the people who feel they have lost everything, let them see a shining light
For the mother's who have lost their children
For my family and friends
For the addicted

Mother's Day

2009-05-11T22:13:00.000-04:00

Best 1st Mother's Day ever yesterday! Slept in, woke-up to Josh making breakfast, read my newspaper. Then hung-out with my mom in the afternoon and went to Stonewood for dinner. Plus, I got my new camera and I love it! I love relaxing.
Last Mother's Day I was nine months pregnant and so swollen. I had to wait almost a whole year for a Mother's Day. Which only means next week is Julianna's 1st Birthday! I can't believe it. I have lots to do this week to get ready for her party. But I've decided I'm going to stop stressing so much. Not about the house, or work or laundry or money. I need to be more carefree and enjoy everyday because life is short after all.

Here's some great pics from yesterday.

She's starting to really smile for the camera now.

Julie loves her grandma

They look so much alike

Josh even did the dishes after breakfast

Will she be walking by 1?

Cookie

2009-05-07T23:38:00.000-04:00

Why do people always look and judge? I am not saying that I'm never guilty of this, but at least I keep my thoughts to myself. I'm really one of the nicest people I know and I hate coming into contact with rude people.
So, to the extraordinary un-nice couple that were in Target this evening with their 7 month-old son. I'll have you know...
1. My daughter doesn't always wear plain white onesies with stains all over. She had a diaper accident at the sitter's house today and I forgot to pack nice back-ups.
2. Yes, I give my daughter oatmeal cookies. Only sometimes, not ALWAYS. And when she's screaming of hunger in the cart while I'm plugging along, I grab the first thing I see that I think won't kill her.
3. YOUR son will probably grow-up to be a bully (like the ones on Oprah yesterday) so why don't you just keep it up and have the guilt of raising more a-holes like yourselves.
OK I feel better now.

Things I need to do tomorrow.
1. Get money order for the probate lawyer
2. Pay the mortgages
3. Go to the bank to deposit check
4. Make the car payments.
BTW going on almost two months without any late fees :)

Camera

2009-05-06T08:15:00.000-04:00

A lot of people do not know this, but before I majored in journalism and wwwaaayyy before I switched careers to advertising, I was a photojournalism student in college. I wanted to be a picture-taker. And sadly after two semesters, I came to realize that I was just not that good.

Looking back, I was at a major disadvantage. My best bud in the program was a guy named Daron Dean. We sat in lab together, comparing pics. His exposures were always way better than mine. We went to the same events sometimes to shoot. We'd get back to class...he'd always have a better angle. He got an A++, I always lagged with a B. He had the coolest cameras and lenses...I spent way too much money on shoes and clothes to invest any $$ into equipment. I always thought, I'm just not meant for this. The only thing I had going on that was better than his were my captions, so I became a writer.

By the end of college, Daron had won the Hearst award in photography. It's like the Pulitzer of college! An award for being one of the best in the nation. No shit... of course he was more talented. I was like Wayne Chrebet competing with Jerry Rice. ( Josh that's for you)

Now that I'm in the real world and I read the paper everyday. I have realized something so cool....I could have done it :)

Which brings me to my 1st Mother's Day present. I am getting a digital SLR from Josh. YYEESSS! So exciting. I am going to be a picture taker again. Now, I can take the best pictures ever of my little nugget, which is what this is all about. I've spent a whole year snapping pics with my crummy point and shoot. Too many precious moments have gone by. That tiny, baby face, that's growing so much, will only be little for a short time. And I'll have pics...great ones.

(BTW this is a good time to point-out that 5 months later, we still do not have dvd's of Julie)

I am the type of girl who knows what she wants and usually figures out a way to get it. So, when we got back our unexpected mortage escrow refund, I text Josh right away "I need to talk to you" He called back immediately, (I figured out a long time ago that's a good line to use to get a speedy callback.) Upon which I told him what I'd be using the money for. I didn't think my asking and mentioning the camera was working since after 10 days straight of...gee I'd love a new camera...my camera sucks....I need an SLR. He didn't say anything.

So sorry I ruined my surprise, but at least now I get to pick-out the right one. I love Mother's Day!

Cell

2009-05-02T11:09:00.001-04:00

So excited. I just added mobile blogger. Who needs Twitter now?

Heather

2009-04-28T21:52:00.000-04:00

To my friend Heather,
Thanks for coming over my house tonight. I miss you. I miss hanging out every night. I miss stepping from my front door and walking 10 steps to yours. I miss knowing everything and not having to always wonder where you're at and what you're up to. I miss sipping wine with you weekly and walking in the mornings. I miss having the best neighbors ever. I miss borrowing stuff. I miss pumpkin carvings and boat trips. I miss being able to just talk and sit without having so much responsibilty. I miss the days where the phone wasn't our 1st choice of communication.
But I am so happy we're still good friends. With all the changes, you're still a big part of my life and I love you for that.
Anne

Dentist

2009-04-25T09:25:00.000-04:00

When I was pregnant the best advice I received was from my dentist. Yep that's right, and I wasn't even paying much attention. I had to do all this cavity work because 1. It was something I was putting off for years after college 2. I had the worst pregnant teeth ever...they were sore, sensitive, all the bad stuff you read about in books.
So I had to have three appointments with my dentist while almost 7 months pregnant, with the drilling, filling, sloshing. It really sucked. And beyond that I had this man telling me while I was laying on my prego back, belly sticking way-up in the air. "Enjoy your free time, after you have kids you'll think, wow I never really was too busy." Then a couple of minutes later..." Yeah you will also wonder what the heck I did with all of that free time."
I truly was laying there thinking, yeah, yeah, bbbbbooooyyyyy, don't you know how busy I am. I run a magazine, I run a house, I am on the go non-stop. I really don't have any free time now.

HAHA... I was so wrong. Now this week I'm wondering what the hell I was thinking. I should have listened to him. Now, not only am I busy...I'm a day late and a dollar short on everything! I can't do anything great because I'm stretched so thin (while gaining weight btw)....oh yeah plus, don't forget the whole other being I am responsible for doing everything for because she's not the phenom we thought she'd be. Did I also mention the supreme sleep deprivation that comes along with all of this.

Dr. Westberry you were sooo right. I just wish someone would have given me advice as to what to do when your precious angel has a fever all night and sleep and you feel helpless. This post is on the coat-tails of such a night.

Things I am grateful for today.
1. Josh, the amazing man who was up most of the night with Julie.
2. My cool dentist, who fixed all my teeth and graduated from UF. I couldn't have picked a better one.

Eleven

2009-04-18T22:13:00.000-04:00

Today I'm grateful for...
My little baby, Julie, who's 11 months-old. Next month it'll be a year. I can't believe it.
The birth of Missy's nephew and a healthy delivery for Monica and baby Max.
My mom and all the cool treats she made at the Italian festival.
Josh getting up in the middle of the night to feed Julie, since I'm sick.
My mind and all the great ideas I have for work on Monday.
My ability to relax this weekend and not be a clean freak (being sick is helping)
The awesome nap I took on the couch this afternoon. Two hours baby!!

Stairs

2009-04-16T23:51:00.001-04:00

I knew it was going to happen one day. I didn't know when and I honestly didn't think it would be this soon. I also had no idea it was going to hurt so bad. Late Tuesday night I fell down the stairs.
When we moved into our house, I thought to myself "I wonder how long it's gonna take for me to take a dive down these bad boys." I didn't even make it a year.
I broke my toe, maybe two I can't tell. And I bruised the hell out of my knee. But thankfully that was it. To my justification, it was dark ( I didn't want to turn the light on and wake Julie) and I was sooo tired. I only missed the last two steps.
I just laid face down on the tile floor balling...poor Josh did a good job of not freaking out or laughing for that matter. And after it took me ten minutes to even move, I was able to chuckle a bit on the couch while watching American Idol. I knew I broke something since I heard a crack on the way down. That's why I laid there for so long, I couldn't pinpoint the pain.
Now, I just hope and pray Julianna will never do it...but unfortunately I think it's inevitable. I will do my best to be there to catch her :)

Things I need to do this weekend
1. Pay the Hollywood bills
2. Get stuff together for our Sat morning neighborhood garage sale...maybe (Josh isn't thrilled about this)
3. Plant my geranium
4. Walk. The weather's been amazing and I need the excercise.

Easter

2009-04-13T23:21:00.000-04:00

Had a great Easter Sunday. Good food, great friends & family. And I actually got to relax a little. We loved having Josh's best friend visit with his family, including Julianna's best friend too. It was so cute to see Julianna interact with somone her own age. Actually they're only two days apart. What I learned from having Daniella at our house??...

Julie is behind in walking, but she's advanced in eating. REALLY this is no surprise. BTW see below for those long, sexy legs she has.. She better enojoy them now. It's all down hill from here.

The only crummy part was that Julie got sick and puked all over her dress on the way to church. She's got impecable timing.. And me being the empathetic mommy that I am, could only scream..No!! we don't have any pictures yet. Josh found this hilarious.

Baskets for Julie, Daniella and Brandon

Julie in her dress. This was after she puked.

Only family pic we took because Julianna was not feeling well.

My dining room. I was so excited to finally be using it.

Super cute BFF eggs.

Josh...in his own words, "I look like a tool"

Loving her easter basket

BFF

Article

2009-04-12T02:16:00.000-04:00

Read this LA Times article about Maddie.

Baskets

2009-04-12T00:03:00.000-04:00

I can not wait to make Julianna's Easter basket tonight!! It's past midnight and we're just waiting for our "little company" to fall asleep. I remember how excited I used to be waking up on Easter and it's amazing to pass along the traditions to Julianna. We're having a big dinner tomorrow at our house. The first time using our new (well at least to us) dining room.
Pics will def come tomorrow.

Have you ever been in a supermarket walking by someone you knew but couldn't put your finger on it? Well last night I was at Publix on Williamson and I kept walking by this woman and I knew her... especially her face so well. This was the conversation I had in my head.

She's not a friend...hmmm church...nope...work? Yes, maybe she's a realtor! hmmm...nope, or she works in one of the offices?????NOPE. Geesh...I know her face so well. It's really familiar. A server at one of our fav restaurants? Which one? Oh I bet Mulligans. Hmmm...well we haven't been there in so long. So nope....urgghh this is annoying me now. Then 10 minutes later! The dog track, poker room. That's it! She serves me my diet coke.
This is a sign I've played too much poker.

Light

2009-04-10T00:07:00.000-04:00

On one of the blogs I follow I read about a little baby girl named Madeline Sporh who passed away a few days ago. She was only 17 months-old and died unexpectedly after surviving a premature birth. I am one of hundreds who have written about her, as her mother's blog is well-read in the mommy blogging world. Her story has touched the lives of many.
I can not even come close to imagining the grief. For those of us with healthy children, let us not forgot how blessed we are. I will take a step back every time I am annoyed with Julie's crying or waking up in the middle of the night. Josh and I are blessed beyond belief and it can all be taken away at any time.

Please pray for Maddie's family especially her parents Heather and Mike. I pray that they are able to accept God's will and thank them for sharing their story.

Also, if you can, donate to the March of Dimes in Maddie's name.

Right

2009-04-07T00:42:00.000-04:00

I was finally catching up on some Oprah this weekend, when I saw the Suze Ormon episode about surviving in this recession. It seems like my post from this weekend is kinda on track. She said "focus on what you have not what you had" Great advice. BTW see below for this show that aired today about motherhood, but that's a whole different upcoming entry.

So with this advice here's my list focusing on what I have vs. what I had....

I have an amazing beautiful, smart daughter
I have the best partner in Josh, who's the best father in the world & makes me feel loved
I have a loving relationship with my mother that's based on understanding
I have a job that pays my bills
I have my dream house in a nice safe neighborhood to raise Julie
I have friends that are like family
I have a two income family
I have my dad's spirit with me always
I have opportunities to meet lots of people on a daily basis
I have the best caregiver for Julianna
I have two cars that are reliable, comfortable and safe
I have the ability to do all the tasks for all the roles in my life
I have a career that I let's me grow
I have a career in a field that I love
I have some nice things
I have a passion for my faith

Oprah

2009-04-07T00:32:00.001-04:00

This show today was amazing.

Sunshine

2009-04-04T23:15:00.000-04:00

I have kept in mind the things that I am grateful for because of all the challenges I faced this week. My job has been extremely stressful and I'm not making any money. It's been so frustrating to not be able to sell a $300 ad with lots of value and a marketing program that's amazing when two years ago I was selling tons of $5,000 ads at the newspaper with hardly any value and with little effort. Plus, I was making twice as much money!! and had hardly any responsibilties.
I keep trying to tell myself that I am lucky to even have a job these days, especially in a field that I love. But it's just been one of those weeks. I was on the phone with my boss and actually started crying...I think and hope he didn't realize.
I wish I didn't take work so personal and think about it all the time. It's very confusing to know how meaningful work should be in your life. It's def fourth in what matters to me most. God, family, friends...yep then work. How can it not be personal when I spend 50 hours a week doing something? That's def more time I get to spend with my daughter, which is crazy.
I could write a million things that I need from my job- like getting a question answered without having to email someone 5 times...Can you tell my frustration here? But let's focus on the positive. These are the things I want from my job.
1. Satisfaction
2. Support
3. Achievement
4. Tranquility
5. Efficiency
6. Growth

I was at the post office this week and waited in line with an older gentleman. He looked probably about 60. He waited in line and when it was his time to go to the window...he asked the lady at the counter for a job application. She said they weren't hiring, in fact they're on a hiring freeze. He then said in a desperate tone, "I saw the ad in the pennysaver". She informed him that those ads are not placed by the USPS, but rather an outside company who basically takes advantage of people. He said thanks and walked away disappointed. Now I know nothing about this guy, he could be fine, but my mind has made-up this story in my head that he really needs a job and he's going place to place to look for work. He's older and should be retiring, but can't. This may not be true at all, but whatever his situation is, I pray that he finds a job, happiness and whatever else he was looking for when he asked for that job application.

He did me a favor by really making me take a step back to realize that I should be grateful for all that I have in life. I am also grateful for one of my advertisers. She choose to pay it foward to me. That was the best part of my job this week.

Flowers

2009-03-27T23:55:00.000-04:00

I have this compulsion lately with flowers. Maybe it's because it's spring and I feel like everything is so green and colorful and pretty. I find myself looking at peoples plants and flowers through every neighborhood, in every real estate office, even in front of Walgreens. I can name more specimens than any gardening geek and now I find myself googleing (is that a word yet?) ixoras and strawflowers.

What is up???

I'll tell you and am now I'm writing this down for the first time. I want to be a florist.

It would be my dream job. Don't get me wrong, I really do love my job and am expertly infatuated with advertising too, but I think the happiest job in the world would be to be around flowers all day and arrange them and smell them....yes this is an obsession.

It's not something I want to do now. I can't imagine leaving my job at the bottom of the market, but when I'm 50, YOU WILL SEE ME IN A FLOWER APRON.

I have it all planned out....what exactly? Anne DiNapoli Floral Designs

In a bright pink sign with white script lettering and a green hydrangea at the bottom right side of my sign.

It's like the movie Bed of Roses, only with an old lady grandma twist. (Josh you can be my Christian Slater)

That's my retirement dream.